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Originally posted by Mort Canard:

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Originally posted by 303Guy:
Best Peacock killing tool? Me!

Give me a call!

What's the hold-over on a head shot from New Zealand to Michigan?

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Originally posted by mousegun1:
Dig a large deep hole - fill with ice.Take 12 oz. package of Birdseye frozen peas ( no substitutions please)-scatter peas around perimeter of hole when peacock tries to take a pea. kick him right in the ice hole!!

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One decided to eat my imported hot peppers and he died from a dose of machete.

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Originally posted by Bailey Bradshaw:
Will the booze loaded grain work on chickens too?

This thread has me cackling like a damn peacock.

This isn't a story on killing peacocks, but more of what NOT to try on Muscovy ducks. I was in the Navy at the time, living off base in a little house that backed up to a pond chock full of the ugliest web footed creatures ever created. I also had a pair of Jack Russel terriers who had convinced themselves it was their job to kick every duck as in the area. They wouldn't kill them, just mame them, and when the fight was over, they lost interest. I had been out to sea on one of Clinton's brilliant anti drug efforts in the Caribean ( dumb ass) and my wife had to contend with them. She had our neighbor dispatch the ducks until I got home.

So I get a call that there was a wounded duck in the yard, leave the ship and head home to wring it's neck. I get there, stride confidently across the yard, pick up the duck and imediately notice the extra heft. Figuring I was plenty strong enough to deal with the 20+ lb duck and just sling it and snap it, I go to wind milling this thing trying to get up enough steam to break it's neck. Feathers are going all over, the duck is trying to kill me with it's wings,and it's neck is still intact. So I figure in mid stroke that I will just spike it on the ground. I do so, it bounces and hauls ass across the yard.....obviously that didn't work.

Next though was to use my staff. I trained in martial arts back then and had a 6' staff to practice with on the back porch. Grab the staff, approach the duck and give him a swing the Babe himself would have been proud of. Right in the head. It's noggin slams into the ground, and thinking the deed was done, I start to turn away....until it's damn head pops back up wiggling back and forth like it's had a bunch of the loaded grain. At this point, my 22yr old man hood is in jeopardy, so I decide to REALLY swing for the fences. WHACK, slam....up comes it's head again!! Now,... I've done martial arts, boxed, wrestled, work cattle and helped my Dad shoe Arab show horses at this point of my life. I've been hit, knocked out, run over and chocked almost unconcious, and one thing I know is this damn duck is far tougher than I ever was.

Next weapon of coice, or what was close at hand and seemed more lethal than my staff....7 iron. I was an honest 7 handicap back then, so I line up on the ducks neck, it's head still weaving, and take a full swing...... Damn thing lives up to it's name same and ducked it! I couldn't beleive it, and at this point I felt like ALL of my neighbors were watching and half were on the phone to the authorities. I finaly got it with the second swing, but that duck earned my respect. As we say here in Texas, " he was one tough sumbitch".

So, what ever you do, don't grab that peacock by the neck thinking it will be easy, keep a 7 iron handy and hit it a little fat.....just to make sure.