Ladies and Gentlemen,

I just finished the worst safari book of all time. It was Rick Boyer's Mzungu Mjinga. Boyer is a successful mystery novelist, but this is his real account of his first safari. A 10 day buffalo hunt in northern Tanzania in 1995.

A repetitive, rambling, egocentric pile of buffalo dung full of numerous misspellings (particularly Swahili words). Boyer and his PH did not get along at all (Boyer's nickname for the PH was "Hard-On"). The assistant PH described Boyer as the second worst client they ever had. Boyer changed the name of the PH, he was called "Glen Schacht" in the book.

Boyer and his hunting buddies shot all of their game from the hunting car. Except for the one buffalo they each took. One time they chased a herd of buffalo in the hunting car but couldn't get off a shot.

Boyer hunted with a Winchester .300 Win Mag and a Remington Custom shop .458 Win Mag (both with muzzle breaks). The Remington would jam and not feed a round from the magazine. So basically, it was a single shot rifle.

What a waste of paper and ink.

Regards,

Terry

I just read Bunny Allen's wheel of life. Don't waste your time. It is basically a recount of an old man's sexual conquests with a smattering of hunting thrown in for effect.

I was truely disapointed.

I'll put Muzungu on the never mind list as well.

The worst book I ever read was on how to plan your safari. Unfortunately it was written by a guy who made exactly ONE plains game hunt.

I like the "first trip to Africa" stories, but that book was ridiculous.

I think I read how to plan a safari also, if it was the same book it was bad, the guy did one hunt and mounted his own game if I recall correctly, but I've slept since then.

True at First Light and Green Hills of Africa were two of the most painful reads I have ever had, bar none. Best described as "pulling teeth with tweezers".

I know it's sacrelige and the high muckity-mucks may have liked old Ernie's claptrap but I for one, would have used the female characters in both books for lion bait. Calling him "the poor mans Hemingway" is probably the greatest insult ever heaped on R. Ruark.

Just my two cents worth,

DC300

I also thought that Bunny Allen's book was disappointing. As for true at first light, After reading it it was clear that Hemmingway was right in not publishing it. It needed more work.

It's not exactly a safari book, but John Taylor's "Shadows of Shame" made me sick. It's one of the books that I had a lot of trouble with from start to finish.

AD

Terry,

I will avoid that book on your recommendation. Like others I thought that book on planning a safari by I think Conroy was the worst "how to" book ever. The toughest read was as mentioned True at First Light. It was real work to read it. I liked the Green Hills very much though. I guess I expected True at First Light to be similiar. Not!

Regards,

Mark

I have often wondered why Safari Press published Conrads "Safari Guide". If you read it carefully, he actually had a pretty poor safari.

It should of been titled "How not to go on Safari"

Hopefully Conrad made enough money off it to afford a first class hunt.

I have "True at First Light" but have never read it. I also have "True at First Light" on audio book/tape and it isn't (edited) too bad. Some parts are ridiculous and he has to have his bullshit braggy sessions, given it is a fictional book. Far too much hubby-wifey conflict and discussions for my liking.

I have listened to it perhaps a half-dozen times as I work as it helps pass monotonous tasks. It isn't too bad in this format. However it isn't 10% of Karen Blixen (also semi-fictional BTW).

It sounds like a good book.





Price: $29.95

Author: Conrad, Richard
Data: 2001 Long Beach, 314pp, photos



"Dozens of books have been published in the last decade on tales of African hunting, but few, if any, give a comprehensive country-by-country and animal-by-animal comparison or a guide on how to plan your (first) safari. It need not cost the price of a new car to go on safari, and Richard Conrad tells you why. He takes the mystery out trophy fees, concession fees, and daily fees, and he teaches you how to shop and find a decently priced kudu or buffalo. He lists equipment needed, questions to ask, parks to visit, and he discusses travel and health issues. He also covers basic firearms choices, international travel with firearms, trophy care, and where to hunt what and when. In addition, he covers the "golden triangle of safari hunting" in Zambia, Zimbabwe, South Africa, Botswana, Mozambique, and Namibia where 90 percent of today's safaris take place. He also writes about the exotic destinations in East and West Africa for those in search of more adventure. Let others tell the tales of charging baboons and pit vipers, here is a practical, down-to-earth, fact-filled book on what you need to know before you go--a guide that will save you thousands of dollars by helping you avoid common mistakes and pitfalls. Spend a few dollars now, and you will be thousand of bucks wiser."

All this from a guy who went on one plains game safari.

Killers in Africa by A. Lake has got to be the biggest load of Bull I have ever read.

A pom who never shot anything writing about how to hunt dangerous game from listening to bar room stories - apparently also by people who had never hunted in Africa.

If you can find one in your local library it might be worth a giggle to reach the first few pages - like why you must never use a solid on elephant

My vote goes to Bunny Allen's Wheel of Life. Growing up in the last 40 years has taught me how sensitive we must be to others, you know the politically correct way. This book was about how Bunny was the all time new breed of human, the Greatest Person Ever Born! Bunny Allen was a self important, narcsisist(?) of the highest order. No hollywood safari film would ever have been made without him. His clients were all shadows of himself in all matters of life, hunting, and love. God help the poor woman who shot that rhino! Instead of savoring the moment a great kill, she had this fool force himself on her. How about the walks to the tent everynight, you HAD to kiss the Bunny goodnight. Of course it was in the Spirit of Safari. Anything can happen on safari, including losing any self respect you had.

Safari Press was going to refund my money for this, but I ate it. It sits on the bookshelf next to the Safari Guide, reminding me about poorly written books. Maybe it will appreciate like the Amwell Press Wheel's has (also on the bookshelf, but this one was a gift, and I've never have read it). Don't get me started...

Say what you will about Bunny Allen, but I would have loved to hunt with him.You would have never been bored, that's for sure.What a colorful guy! I personally enjoy his personality,as he will entertain you as well as give you a great safari.I like his spirit.

I am surprised at the opinion on Conrads Safari book. I have been reading everything I can get my hands on concerning Safari for over a year and his book is well laid out. It contains alot of the same info that you find on this forum.

Whether he had a great trophy Safari is totally unrelated to the material he tried to convey.

Not a relative.

Sprig

How about a waste of our time and money...

quote:

Originally posted by Wolfgar:
Say what you will about Bunny Allen, but I would have loved to hunt with him.You would have never been bored, that's for sure.What a colorful guy! I personally enjoy his personality,as he will entertain you as well as give you a great safari.I like his spirit.

Wolfgar,

If your idea of "entertainment" is watching some guy try and screw your wife.

I read "Wheel of Life" last year. Worst book I have ever forced myself through, and I only did that because I paid its weight in gold to get the book from Safari Press (shipping to Canada effectively doubles the price...then you have to convert to CDN on top!). It sits on my shelf waiting the next 470 penetration tests.

Thanks for the tip Terry. If this book is worse than Bunny's I'd sure hate to have ordered it too!

Cheers,
Canuck

Maybe I am not worried about some guy trying to screw my wife, since I am pretty sure that my wife has her hands full already with me. Besides, I think an old bastard like Bunny knows who's wife he can mess with, as well as which man he damm well better not!! Survival of the fittest! I would rather hunt with Bunny any old day rather than some stuffy up-tight high browed A-hole. My 2cents

Like Mark said, True at First Light was really hard to read. I had to force my way through each sentence. Most of Hemingway's stuff is slow going, but this was bad. I've already not recommended it to lots of people - I'll say it again here.

When I was attempting to obtain information about Africa and Safaris...before joining AR. I purchased the Conrad Book...what a waste of money!

I am comforted to know that I am not the only one committing heresy by having a damned hard time enjoying Hemingway!!
Ruark didn't exactly blow the hair off my head either.

Mike

Yep, True at First Light is awful. You can really tell that Hemingway's alcoholism had progressed by the time he did his second safari in the 1950s (1953 or 54?). The book is just the ramblings of a mind unable to focus.

-Bob F.

I purchased Conrad's Safari Guide before my trip to Namibia because it was 40% off. What I found out was that I had really wasted 60%! The info I gathered here on AR was much more useful.

quote:

Originally posted by DC300:
True at First Light and Green Hills of Africa were two of the most painful reads I have ever had, bar none. Best described as "pulling teeth with tweezers".

DC300

Aaaarrggghhh, Green hills of Africa is one of my absolute favourites - although I never made it through True at First Light. Guess it is quite a personal decision...
- mike

While Bunny A's. book is not a great read, I didn't feel Safari Press misrepresented the book in their discription. Thye told you what you were going to read and that's what it was. Having one of his earlier books I thought I'd give it a too.
Regards safari Guide, I haven't read it, but it's sitting on the shelf unopened. Have not idea why I bought it. Maybe I didn't could have been a "gift", I don't know. If it was then based on comments posted here it was not much of a gift.
As to the worst, I don't know. I'd have to go through the shelves, but I am sure some of Chapsticks re-editing of earlier writers would be close. The originals didn't his blather added in. They we fine as was. JMO. His original writing is heads and shoulders above the "re-dones" Now I'll go hid from all the Chapstick fans.

Allen Day:

John Taylor's Shadows of Shame made me sick.... I had a lot of trouble with it from start to finish

Was this the 'autobiography' of the man behind the shooting books and his run ins with contemporary society etc?

I can't get past John Taylor's self agrandizing books. The worst is "Pondoro - A Man Called Lion". After reading his stuff, then accidentally reading Capstick's book about him, the guy is off his nut. His stuff is not worth reading.

"Hemingway on Hunting" is almost as bad as Taylor's work. Hemingway is too depressing and too negative to suit me. If I felt the way he did about things, I would have considered life a waste of time as he apparently did.

quote:

Originally posted by dogcat:
I can't get past John Taylor's self agrandizing books. The worst is "Pondoro - A Man Called Lion". After reading his stuff, then accidentally reading Capstick's book about him, the guy is off his nut. His stuff is not worth reading.

Isn't "Pondoro - A Man Called Lion" actually written by Capstick?

I have never liked Capstick's biographies.

My dubious vote goes to "True at First Light." It reads like a 10 year old wrote wrote it. I was never able to finish it. jorge

My votes go to "Solo Safari" by Terrance Cacek and "Chui" by Lou Hallamore & Bruce Woods.

Actually "Chui" contains a lot of interesting information but I just don't like Bruce Woods style of writing...

You mean y'all can actually read?

I'll go for True At first Light in a dead heat withall of Ruark. Booze had to be the problem with both authors. And I'm no Morman schoolboy either.

Surestrike, you have a PM

quote:

My votes go to "Solo Safari" by Terrance Cacek and "Chui" by Lou Hallamore & Bruce Woods.

Solo Safari was, and remains one of my favorite books. I am selling off my collection and this one is one of the half dozen or so I will keep. To each his own!

As for the worst, Wheel of life wins, followed be Beyond the River Bend and Killers in Africa.

Jason

quote:

Originally posted by Ganyana:
Killers in Africa by A. Lake has got to be the biggest load of Bull I have ever read.

A pom who never shot anything writing about how to hunt dangerous game from listening to bar room stories - apparently also by people who had never hunted in Africa.

If you can find one in your local library it might be worth a giggle to reach the first few pages - like why you must never use a solid on elephant

Roy and me have had quite a few laughs discussing this book.

We go to great lengths trying to believe what is written - as we have learnt that in hunting, things do change from one situation to another.

But, we drew the lines when Lake mentioned that he shot a baboon at something like 700 yards, and when he got to it, he found the bullet hit 3 inches lower than he intended - or something to this effect!

quote:

Originally posted by Don_G:
You mean y'all can actually read?

I am SPEECHLESS!

I'll go along with the crowd and say that "The Wheel of Life" was a huge disappointment. Got it for a birthday gift and couldn't wait to get into it. It was painful to read. While, we throwing them up, I must admit the Captick " Death in insert here" are bit generic and cut from the same cloth.

Any of you who have Bunny Allen's "Wheel of Life" want to sell it to me for really cheap?
Seriously I want to read it so I can judge for myself. So let me know if you want to sell it really cheap since it's such a bad book and all.