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One of Us |
Saeed: "HELP!" Saeed:"I am failing, miserably, in trying to dissuade the women from coming along!" Saeed:"What does one have to DO to keep them away?" Me: That has been one of the major questions for the Ages! Me: Let us know when you have found the answer! Me: Remember, Mr. Nice Guy, YOU opened Pandora's Box! Me: It is difficult to put the genie back into the bottle! Me: Perhaps a serious consultation with your good friend and confident, Walter, might be in order! If not, have Alan and Roy contact a witch doctor! You might need to keep one on Retainer! | |||
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Administrator |
I think I am done for! One called yesterday to book a place for herself and her daughter!!?? Someone suggested may be I should try to be nice for a change, that might get the desired effect. Another suggested a classic desert avoidance trip - getting well and truly stuck, and having to walk out for miles and miles. Sounds interesting | |||
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Hmmm... Walking out might work if you explain about the snakes that live under the sand so the sun doesn't cook them. | |||
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Administrator |
This opens up a lot of possibilities. Everyone here is scared of snakes. I think I am going to get some rubber desert snakes! | |||
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One of Us |
I bet you could get your money's worth out of a spool of 4 lb. monofilament fishing line to go with the rubber snakes and a competent assistant too. Don't forget to inspect the undercarriage of the vehicle for hitch-hikers after you see the first snake. (Passengers have to take a turn at inspection as well) Have any of the women seen the movie Dune? | |||
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Administrator |
Very realistic rubber snakes are here. As well as all sorts of nasty insects and worms Got a spool of very fine 0.3mm fishing line, which should aid in this adventure. I need some assistance in this, so I will see who of the husbands is willing put his life in danger. Stay tuned. | |||
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Administrator |
My brothers keep falcons, and this afternoon I went out to their falcon training ground. The idea was to video the goings on with my drone. I did get some nice footage, and got a bit of excitement too. Some of the falcons started chasing my drone!!? Only way to get away was put it into full speed vertical going up! We discovered that falcons are very fast. But not straight up. We all had a bit of a laugh. I will see if I can extract some shots to post here. They use specially prepared model airplanes. They tie a lore to it, with a tiny parachute. They can release it with a remote control. | |||
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One of Us |
DO NOT forget to tie a snake underneath the vehicle in a place to be easily found when you send her to check the undercarriage. Preferably close enough to te rear bumper that it's almost in her face when she crawls under to look. | |||
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One of Us |
What kind of falcons? Peregrines? Hybrids? I have put my dogs down for a friend who was very involved with them and his peregrine/gyr hybrid was awesome! Big and really fast! | |||
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One of Us |
Have you started a travel agency??!! I can just picture it all: BOOK NOW WITH SAEED'S DESERT ADVENTURES! Act immediately and your DISCOUNT PACKAGE will include: continental breakfast, tea and crumpets, soft drinks, a camel ride, and your choice of one of the following: 1) personal instructions and a hands on experience in getting total strangers unstuck from the sand; or, 2) locating and removing highly poisonous snakes while walking barefoot in the sand dunes. Finally, the first 400 women and girls to book with Saeed within the NEXT 24 HOURS will also receive a personally autographed and recently published memoir by Saeed, entitled: "I think I am done for! How being a Nice Guy opened Pandora's Box!" | |||
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Administrator |
Very sad to see some of you enjoying my predicament! And for your information, I AM A NICE MAN! When I joined the Greater Houston Gun Club, they gave me a name tag. I asked if I could have another one, and was told I can have as many as wanted, as long as I paid for them, one gets one free with membership. So I asked for one that says MR NICE GUY. I put on, and meeting new people was very nice, as everyone called me my new name! Sadly, it did not last very long, those Texans have no manners! Called me every name under the sun, non of them was very nice. I got my own back on them, by showing them what a useless lot they were. I won the Texas State Championship, and representing the State of Texas, won the Champion of Champions too. And The Doubles Championship of America! Useless lot those Texans. Had to get a poor Bedouin from the desert to win trophies for them! Got threatened of being lynched! I told them if they are as good at lynching as they were at shooting, I have nothing to worry about! | |||
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Damn, Saeed, YOU'RE FUNNY!! This has beaten ANYTHING that Walter could possibly conjure up! | |||
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One of Us |
From the pictures the birds look to be mostly hybrids. The building site in 2006... What is it? | |||
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Went out a couple of days ago to the falcons again, trying to get better videos. Almost had a head on collision with one falcon, who thought my drone was a bird! Got some great photos. | |||
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Administrator |
I think I might have a change of heart on this. By the looks of it, the more girls turn up the more fun for the rest of us, especially me! Two girls joined us yesterday, and some of the camels took a fancy to them! The camels kept following THEM! The girls were screaming bloody murder, and laughing, and saying "why is he following ME?" I was laughing so much, tears were coming down my cheeks. I said "I think he took a fancy to you!" No more bargaining to how many camels for a girl now. One for one is the established rate now, by the camels themselves! The secret was I brought a large bag of cucumbers, which the camels absolute love. Now the girls have promised to bring more cucumber, carrots and apples next week - being in demand apparently is what they like, even by a camel! | |||
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One of Us |
What's that old saying? WHEN YOU CAN'T BEAT THEM-JOIN THEM! Looks like you've learned to turn your desert lemons into lemonade! Now, WHERE'S THE PHOTOS, MR. NICE GUY!? | |||
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I am going to see if I can get rid of all the men. Girls are much more fun to be with | |||
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One of Us |
Duh! Why did it take you 70 years to finally figure that one out??! You should mention to the girls that the camel herder has offered to trade you one camel for each new potential wife that you bring out to him each weekend, and that so far, you have been able to trade 30 girls to him in order to establish your "seed herd" of camels that they are feeding and having their pictures taken with. | |||
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Administrator |
Got 4 booked for the weekend! Once I get a sizeable number, I will tell the boys to get lost! Was at a holiday resort, sitting at the breakfast table with several ladies. The restaurant manager came over and said "Mr. Saeed, you have all the ladies with you this morning!" One of them said "we are all his wives!" His smile disappeared quicker than a snow drop on fire! | |||
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One of Us |
Most men have the sense to only attempt management of one wife/girlfriend at a time. That came to be the case because most of us have at times tried to manage more than one at a time at some period in our lives and learned from that experience. Perhaps you can do a great public service across the world and document this experiment??? | |||
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One of Us |
OLD AGE AND TREACHERY! | |||
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Administrator |
It is WORKING! I have more girls booked for tomorrow than boys! Founds some very realistic looking small snakes. The food hamper would be a good place for them. These bloody desert snakes get everywhere! | |||
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One of Us |
Please say that there are provisions in place for AR to continue in case things go sideways. I would hate to be the person who suggested an idea that brought you to a bad end | |||
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One of Us |
Saeed: ARE YOU TRYING TO SHOOT YOURSELF IN THE FOOT?! I thought that you WANTED girls to JOIN YOU!!! SNAKES AND GIRLS DON'T MIX, MR. NICE GUY!! | |||
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One of Us |
I second this notion. | |||
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Administrator |
You two are from the stone age! I remember a song in my youth saying something like girls love spiders and snakes! Got some nice spiders too! All packed to go this morning! | |||
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One of Us |
The song was "Spiders and Snakes" by Jim Stafford. Here are the lyrics, MR. NICE GUY! I remember when Mary Lou said 'You want to walk me home from school' And I said, 'Yes, I do' She said, 'I don't have to go right home And I'm the kind that likes to be alone As long as you would' I said, 'Me, too' And so we took a stroll Wound up down by the swimmin' hole And she said, 'Do what you want to do' I got silly and I found a frog In the water by a hollow log And I shook it at her And I said 'This frog's for you' She said [Chorus] 'I don't like spiders and snakes And that ain't what it takes to love me You fool, you fool I don't like spiders and snakes And that ain't what it takes to love me Like I want to be loved by you' Well, I think of that girl from time to time I call her up when I got a dime I say, "Hello, baby' She says, 'Ain't you cool' I say, 'Do you remember when? And would you like to get together again?' She says, 'I'll see you after school' I was shy and so for a while Most of my love was touch and smile 'Til she said, 'Come on over here' I was nervous as you might guess Still looking for somethin' to slip down her dress And she said, 'Let's make it perfectly clear' She said [Chorus] Writer/s: DAVID BELLAMY, JIM STAFFORD Publisher: Warner Chappell Music, Inc., Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC Good luck! You're going to need all the help that you can get! We'll need video on this one! | |||
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Administrator |
The trip was a resounding success! No snakes or spiders this time, but we all had a ball. And only in Dubai does one get a travelling salesman coming to the desert to sell his ware! Honestly, a four wheel car drove up, and a man came out. Handed us all his card. And from the spelling, I knew he must be Polish! I said "where are you from?" "I am from Poland" I said "I am sorry, we were told to never trust any Polack! Only people worse than Polacks are Arabs!" You should have seen the look on his face! A French friend came over, I looked towards him and said "The Arabs and Polacks are very bad. But, nowhere near the French! Like this one!" Suddenly the joke sunk in, and we all laughed. He was selling an inflator/deflator system. You connect it to your compressor, and it has a long hose with four connections, and a pressure gage. You can deflate all 4 tires to the same pressure from a single point, rather than doing each one by itself. You can also inflate all tires the same pressure, at the same time. I am going to him and get him to install one in my Toyota Lancruiser. | |||
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One of Us |
Poor Pollack! He gets to spend his next few years all over north Africa and the middle east with Arabs who want to mess with his head when all he wants to do is sell them a very good idea. | |||
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One of Us |
Ok, MR. NICE GUY, now WHERE ARE THE PICS TO BACK ALL OF THIS UP!? And, make sure that we see the Polack and his contraption as well! Damn, this thread gets more addicting every week! Walter's antics do not hold a candle to Saeed's!! | |||
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My new friend from Poland came over yesterday, and I bought one of these new hose setups from him. Makes deflating and inflating very easy, as all four tires can be done at once. Removing the hassle of doing each one by itself. And as I have to that quiet often, this system is great. It is very hard explain to people how important very low pressure in the tires is required driving on sand. Had to give a friend a demo a while back. My Landcruiser is normally run at about 35 PSI in all tires for normal road use. We drove away from the road, to an open area surrounded by sand dunes. Some large and some small. Gave him the drivers seat, and got him to drive on the smaller dunes with35 PSI. made sure he was in 4 Hi, and 3rd gear but keep his speed up. Went over a few dunes. Then we let the air down to 16 PSI, and did it all over again. He was amazed how different the drive was. Generally, I keep my tires at about 20 PSI, as I drive more often in sandy areas here than on roads. Only put more pressure in if I am driving long distances on roads. Once in the desert, I get the pressure down to around 16 PSI. Last Friday we had lost of fun driving bikes and quad bikes. Then the girls wanted to see the camels. Trouble was we have no idea where they went. So we had to drive around looking for them. Hessa saw them miles away, and we had to do a sort of cross country to get to them. On the way back, I thought of finding the shortest way out of the dunes. I fell in a bloody big hole. Saw it too late as I came over the top of a big dune, and there was no way to avoid it, so I hit the gas. Sand was flying all over the car - we actually could not see anything for a bit. The girls were screaming bloody murder, laughing their heads off as we came out of it! Others made a very long detour. Bloody wimps! | |||
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One of Us |
So, are you now his official international sales representative and spokesman? You should mention to him that you have already posted a pic of the device, that you have connections and great influence all over the world, and that for just a GUARANTEED 25% of his profits, his sales COULD increase 1,000%! Damn, the Chinese would go crazy with this contraption in the Gobi! Or, the Africans in the Sahara! Think of the possibilities! Maybe you should just buy the company! As to you, MR. NICE GUY, where are the pics proving that you actually did have GIRLS on a trip to the dunes during your last great adventure!? No pics=fake news! And, NO, this has ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to do with Trump, Biden, your so-called Political Crater or Mark Sullivan! | |||
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Sorry my friend, too many visitors keeping me busy. Bloody hell just imagine, a company owned by an Arab, run by a Polack, and sticking it to the bloody Chinks! Will make the whole world will smile! Might even get a smile on Crooked Donald face, despite his secret bank accounts in Beijing! And I am beginning to feel sorry for you. Being a lawyer, spending all your time dealing with crooks and corrupt judges, you do need a break by looking ta some pretty pictures. I will post some later on. | |||
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We have these specially built model planes. They have remote controlled hooks on the bottom. A line, which has a small parachute attached to it, and a further line attached to that, which has a dead pigeon attached to it. The plane is flown, and the falcon chases it. When the pilot thinks the falcon has had enough flying, they slow down the plane, and as the falcon catches the pigeon, they release it. | |||
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One of Us |
"And I am beginning to feel sorry for you." "Being a lawyer, spending all your time dealing with crooks and corrupt judges, you do need a break by looking ta some pretty pictures. I will post some later on." Yes, you are indeed correct about crooks and corrupt judges, as well as a few crooked lawyers! After 38 years of that, it's time to sit back and enjoy the beauty from your pictures! They are nothing short of amazing, but mingled with some very humorous and wicked narrative, from time to time! I do, however, have a Las Vegas Falcon story for you, Saeed. One day while I was home getting ready for work, the front doorbell rang. As we live in a gated community with no soliciting allowed, I quietly went downstairs to answer it with my 45ACP behind my back. When I opened the door and dropped the pistol to my side, there was a man standing there wearing a hat, a heavy coat, a big glove on his left arm and some sort of antenna-type tracking device in his right hand. His eyes literally bulged out when he saw the 45, but he nervously said: " I have tracked my Falcon to your backyard and I need to get her!" Thinking that it might be a ruse for a robbery, I instructed him to go to the side gate and I would meet him there. After I let him in the side gate, we went into the backyard and near the pool we found this female Falcon tearing the hell out of a newly killed pigeon that it had apparently caught in mid-flight and brought to my backyard to eat. He got her to get up on his arm, put a hood over her head, and very quickly left, looking nervously over his shoulder at me and my 45. | |||
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One of Us |
Please convey my appreciation of the condition of those birds to their owners. Also, please ask why they tie a dead pigeon to the airplane and then let the falcon "catch" it. Those are peregines and peregrine/gyr crosses and with a wide open area like the desert the birds would have no trouble flying down a released pigeon. I suspect that they do it their way to save the trouble of chasing down the falcon after it catches a released pigeon. For me, the thrill of watching the falcon stoop on the pigeon and hit it would be worth any trek I had to make to recover the falcon. Where I live I have raptors of many species to watch once the snow is gone. Some few species will stay all winter. | |||
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