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THIS IS THE OFFICIAL MALE SENSITIVITY TEST* * 1. In the company of females, intercourse should be referred to as: * A. Lovemaking.* * B. Screwing.* * C. Taking the pigskin bus to tuna town.* 2. You should make love to a woman for the first time only after you've both shared: * A. Your views about what you expect from a sexual relationship.* * B. Your blood-test results.* * C. Five tequila slammers.* ** ** **3. You time your orgasm so that: * A. Your partner climaxes first.* * B. You b! oth climax simultaneously* * C. You don't miss ESPN SportsCenter.* 4. Passionate, spontaneous sex on the kitchen floor is: * A. Healthy, creative love-play.* * B. Not the sort of thing your wife would agree to.* * C. Not the sort of thing your wife needs to ever find out about.* 5. Spending the whole night cuddling a woman you've just had sex with is: * A. The best part of the experience.* * B. The second best part of the experience.* * C $100 extra.* 6. Your wife/girlfriend says she's gained five pounds in the last month. You tell her that it is: * A. Of no influence on your affectionate feelings for her.* * B. Not a problem, she can join your gym.* * C. A conservative estimate* 7. You think today's sensitive, caring man is: * A. A myth.* * B. An oxymoron.* * C. A moron.* ** **8. Foreplay is to sex as: * A. An appetizer is to entree.* * B. Primer is to paint.* * C. A long line is to an amusement park ride.* 9. Which of the following are you most likely to find yourself saying at the end of a relationship? * A. "I hope we can still be friends."* * B. "I'm not in right now, please leave a message at the beep."* * C. "Welcome to Dumpsville. Population, YOU."* ** **10. A woman who is uncomfortable watching you masturbate: * A. Probably needs a little more time before she can cope with that** sort of intimacy.* * B. Is uptight and a waste of time. ** ***** C. Shouldn't have sat next to you on the bus in the first place.** * Evaluating Results:** ** If you answered "A" more than 7 times, check your pants to make** sure you** really ARE a man.* * If you answered "B" more than 7 times, check into therapy. You're a** little confused.* * If you answered "C" more than 7 times, "YOU DA MAN*** * "I would remind you that extremism in the defense of liberty is no vice. I would remind you also that moderation in the pursuit of justice is no virtue." Barry M Goldwater. | ||
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One of Us |
now that there is funny If you own a gun and you are not a member of the NRA and other pro 2nd amendment organizations then YOU are part of the problem. | |||
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One of Us |
Play hide the salami. | |||
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