Dr. Levy asked 85-year-old Abe Cohen for a sperm sample as part of his annual physical. "Take this jar home and bring back a semen sample tomorrow.
Next day, Abe returned with an empty jar, pristine, untouched.
Dr. Levy asked what happened and Abe explained,
"Well, doc, it's like this - first I tried with my right hand, but nothing. Then I tried with my left hand, but still nothing. Then I asked my wife for help. She tried with her right hand, then her left; still nothing. She tried with her mouth, first with her teeth in, then with her teeth out; still nothing.
We even called Sadie from next door and she tried too, first with both hands, then an armpit; she even tried squeezing it between her knees, but still nothing!
Dr. Levy was shocked! "You asked your neighbor?
Abe replied, "Yeah, but none of us could get the jar open.