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Windows Frozen On a Cold Winters Day
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Wife texts husband on a cold winter’s morning:
"Windows frozen, won't open."

Husband texts back:

"Gently pour some lukewarm water over it
and gently tap edges with hammer."

Wife texts back 5 minutes later:

"Computer really messed up now!”
 
Posts: 157610 | Location: Ukraine, Europe. | Registered: 12 October 2002Reply With Quote
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That sounds like my sister-in-law. I once had to rotate a can of Diet Coke 180° so she could open it. I also had her scrambling around a store for an hour and a half trying to find me some diet bottled water.


All We Know Is All We Are
 
Posts: 1215 | Location: E Central MO | Registered: 13 January 2014Reply With Quote
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rotflmo
 
Posts: 18533 | Registered: 04 April 2005Reply With Quote
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A friend of mines wife is an R.N. in Austin but they live in New Braunfels. She carpooled with another R.N. for 10 years. One night the other girl looks over at the lit up state capital + says,"What's that?" Jane tells that's the capital. The girl says,"I thought that was in Washington." And been riding past it for 10 years.


Never mistake motion for action.
 
Posts: 17357 | Location: Austin, Texas | Registered: 11 March 2013Reply With Quote
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On that same tack,several years ago my ex-daughter in law called me up at the shop (I live next door) + asked me what the current postal rate was. I told her .34 cents.She only has a .32 cent stamp. I told her I had some makeup stamps + would bring her one over. I had some .20 cent Harry Truman stamps,no harm in being over. She's talking on her cel phone to a girlfriend when I arrive. I give her the stamp. She asks Who's this? I tell her Harry Truman,you know the president,the one who dropped the bomb. She says What bomb? Then she asks her girlfriend on the phone,Do you know Harry Truman? + I hear the reply,"Why,is he out in the yard?" I had to turn around + leave.


Never mistake motion for action.
 
Posts: 17357 | Location: Austin, Texas | Registered: 11 March 2013Reply With Quote
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Years back my brother came to my house @ 4am for a morning hunt. We were sitting in the kitchen drinking coffee when my wife (@ the time) half asleep, walked in naked.
When she saw him she screamed, stood there and covered her eyes with both hands.
She finally realized that although she couldn't see him he could still see her and ran out.
We still laugh about it today.
She was brunette. My brother & I are BLONDE.


Cats have nine lives. Which makes them ideal for experimentation...
 
Posts: 947 | Location: NYB | Registered: 01 July 2002Reply With Quote
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rotflmo
 
Posts: 157610 | Location: Ukraine, Europe. | Registered: 12 October 2002Reply With Quote
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quote:
Originally posted by NormanConquest:
On that same tack,several years ago my ex-daughter in law called me up at the shop (I live next door) + asked me what the current postal rate was. I told her .34 cents.She only has a .32 cent stamp. I told her I had some makeup stamps + would bring her one over. I had some .20 cent Harry Truman stamps,no harm in being over. She's talking on her cel phone to a girlfriend when I arrive. I give her the stamp. She asks Who's this? I tell her Harry Truman,you know the president,the one who dropped the bomb. She says What bomb? Then she asks her girlfriend on the phone,Do you know Harry Truman? + I hear the reply,"Why,is he out in the yard?" I had to turn around + leave.



rotflmo
 
Posts: 157610 | Location: Ukraine, Europe. | Registered: 12 October 2002Reply With Quote
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Ottomatic,a few years ago I heard a program on NPR where a woman was saying that in her spa in N.Y. city they can take their small children along. She comes out of the sauna naked of course when her 3 year old takes off through the door into the lobby + heading for the street.Without a thought of modesty at the time she rushes out into the crowded lobby + grabs up her kid + retreats into the spa.Then the reality hits her. Next day while talking to her girlfriends she poses the question,If you were in that position would you try with your hands to cover your top or your bottom. One lady said,"Just my face."


Never mistake motion for action.
 
Posts: 17357 | Location: Austin, Texas | Registered: 11 March 2013Reply With Quote
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