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Will Rogers Humor
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Will Rogers, who died in a 1935 plane crash with his best friend, Wylie Post, was probably the greatest political sage this country ever has known.

Enjoy the following:

1. Never slap a man who's chewing tobacco.


2. Never kick a cow chip on a hot day.

3.. There are two theories to arguing with a woman . . Neither works.


4. Never miss a good chance to shut up.


5. Always drink upstream from the herd.


6. If you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.


7. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it and put it back into your pocket.


8. There are three kinds of men: The ones that learn by reading. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence and find out for themselves.


9. Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.


10. If you're riding' ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there.


11. Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier'n puttin' it back.


12. After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring. He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him. The moral: When you're full of bull, keep your mouth shut.


ABOUT GROWING OLDER...

First ~ Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.

Second ~ The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.

Third ~ Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me; I want people to know 'why' I look this way. I've traveled a long way, and some of the roads weren't paved.

Fourth ~ When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth, think of Algebra.

Fifth ~ You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks.

Sixth ~ I don't know how I got over the hill without getting to the top.

Seventh ~ One of the many things no one tells you about aging is that it is such a nice change from being young.

Eighth ~ One must wait until evening to see how splendid the day has been.

Ninth ~ Being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable.

Tenth ~ Long ago, when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft. Today it's called golf.

And, finally ~ If you don't learn to laugh at trouble, you won't have anything to laugh at when you are old.


NRA Life
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Today's Quote:
Give a man a fish and he eats for a day. Give a man a welfare check, a free cell phone with free monthly minutes, food stamps, section 8 housing, a forty ounce malt liquor, a crack pipe and some Air Jordan's and he votes Democrat for a lifetime.
 
Posts: 4096 | Location: Cherkasy Ukraine  | Registered: 19 November 2005Reply With Quote
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Good Stuff!
 
Posts: 3427 | Registered: 05 August 2008Reply With Quote
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One of my favorites

Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice doggie' until you can find a rock.
Will Rogers
 
Posts: 187 | Location: Late,Great Golden State | Registered: 28 June 2009Reply With Quote
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Timeless Humor!!One Of The best! tu2 beer
 
Posts: 2025 | Location: Grove,OK. | Registered: 20 July 2002Reply With Quote
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I was told by my mother that tact and diplomacy was the art of telling someone to "go to Hell" and have them anticipate the trip!
 
Posts: 37 | Location: SE USA | Registered: 12 September 2010Reply With Quote
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There's a lot of wisdom in that humor. You don't see that so much anymore.

Great stuff. tu2


Mike

Wilderness is my cathedral, and hunting is my prayer.
 
Posts: 13399 | Location: New England | Registered: 06 June 2003Reply With Quote
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