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10 - Life is sexually transmitted. 9 - Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die. 8 - Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see one without an erection, make him a sandwich. 7 - Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; Teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks. 6 - Some people are like a Slinky... not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs. 5 - Health freaks are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing. 4 - All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism. 3 - Why does a slight tax increase cost you 50 quid and a substantial tax cut saves you 50p? 2 - In the 60s, people took LSD to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal. AND THE NUMBER 1 THOUGHT FOR 2006: "We know exactly where any untaxed car is located among the millions of cars in Britain......" .....but we haven't got a clue as to where thousands of illegal immigrants and terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the DVLA in charge of immigration.......!!!! | ||
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