10 - Life is sexually transmitted.

9 - Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

8 - Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see one without
an erection, make him a sandwich.

7 - Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; Teach a person to
use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.

6 - Some people are like a Slinky... not really good for anything, but you
still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.

5 - Health freaks are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals
dying of nothing.

4 - All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention
to criticism.

3 - Why does a slight tax increase cost you 50 quid and a substantial tax
cut saves you 50p?

2 - In the 60s, people took LSD to make the world weird. Now the world is
weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

AND THE NUMBER 1 THOUGHT FOR 2006:

"We know exactly where any untaxed car is located among the millions of
cars in Britain......"

.....but we haven't got a clue as to where thousands of illegal immigrants
and terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the DVLA in charge of
immigration.......!!!!