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------------------------------ A mate of mine has just told me he's shagging his girlfriend and her twin. I said "How can you tell them apart?" He said "Her brother's got a moustache!" | ||
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One of Us |
That funny! Now, everytime my son is watching the Pooh cartoon I won't be able to stop chuckling. NRA Life Member DSC Life Member Government exists to protect us from each other. Where government has gone beyond its limits is in deciding to protect us from ourselves. Ronald Reagan | |||
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In California right now they could do the Charles Lamb thing !! { Dissertation on Roast Pig } | |||
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One of Us |
SWINE FLU WARNING Everyone should be aware that there is a possibility of another outbreak of Swine Flu during the next few months of flu season. In order that you may be on the alert for indications that you or members of your family may have contracted the Swine Flu Virus, you should be aware of the symptoms associated with this disease. Sore throat. Slight headache. Moderate to high temperature. Nausea or upset stomach. An uncontrollable urge to fuck in the mud. Regards, Bob. | |||
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One of Us |
SWINE FLU SYMPTOMS: - Look out for any unusual blemishes or rashers. - Unusual behaviour: doing things you would normally find a complete boar. - Bad temper: things start to easily rind you up. - Overheating: Feeling that you are absolutely bacon hot. - Chills: Feeling like you need to hog the duvet or curl up in front of a crackling fire. - Developing a sty in either or both eyes. - Urgent cravings: for a large glass of swine or stuffing yourself on apples. If any of these symptoms show, then immediately call a hambulance, and go to the hogspital for treatment. Smokers please note it is a non-smoking facility, so you won't be able to have a snout. This could be a false alarm, in which case you can trotter off home, but if the symptoms return, you may need to go to your local farmacy for some oinkment. | |||
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