09 September 2005, 02:26
boom stickfunny hunting accident and other darwin awards (3rd runner up)
Be careful hunting in the mountains this year: See third runner-up--
DARWIN AWARDS
5th RUNNER-UP . . .
Goes to a San Anselmo, California man who died when he hit a lift tower
at the Mammoth Mountain ski area while riding down the slope on a foam
pad. The 22-year old David Hubal was pronounced dead at Central
Mammoth Hospital. The accident occurred about 3 a.m., the Mono County
Sheriff's department said.
Hubal and his friends apparently had hiked up a ski run called Stump
Alley
and undid some yellow foam protectors from lift towers, said Lt. Mike
Donnelly
of The Mammoth Lakes Police Department. The pads are used to protect
skiers who might hit towers. The group used the pads to slide down the
ski
slope and Hubal crashed into a tower. It has since been investigated
and
determined the tower he hit was the one with its pad removed.
4th RUNNER-UP . . .
Is one Robert Puelo, 32, who was apparently being disorderly in a St.
Louis market. When the clerk threatened to call the police, Puelo
grabbed a hot dog, shoved it into his mouth and walked out without
paying. Police found him unconscious in front of the store. Paramedics
removed the six-inch wiener from his throat where it had choked him to
death.
3rd RUNNER-UP . .
Goes to poacher Marino Malerba of Spain, who shot a stag standing above
him on an overhanging rock and was killed instantly when it fell on
him. (Note: This entrant makes this year's Darwin Awards competition
an
international event).
2nd RUNNER-UP . .
A man at a West Virginia party popped a blasting cap into his mouth
and bit down, triggering an explosion that blew off his lips, teeth,
and tongue.
Jerry Stromyer, 24, of Kincaid, bit the blasting cap as a prank during
the party late Tuesday night, said Cpl. M.D. Payne. "Another man had it
in an aquarium hooked to a battery and was trying to explode it.
It wouldn't go off and Stromyer said: 'I'll show you how to set it
off'' and
put it into his mouth," Payne added. Stromyer was listed in guarded
condition Wednesday with extensive facial injuries, according to a
spokesperson at the Charleston Area Medical Division. "I just can't
imagine anyone doing something like that," Payne said.
1st RUNNER-UP . . .
Doctors at Portland University Hospital said an Oregon man shot through
the skull by a hunting arrow is lucky to be alive and will be released
soon from the hospital. Tony Roberts, 25, lost his right eye last
weekend during an initiation into a men's rafting club, Mountain Men
Anonymous in Grant's Pass, Oregon. A friend tried to shoot a beer can
off his head, but the arrow entered Robert's right eye. Doctors said
that had the arrow gone one millimeter to the left, a major blood
vessel would have been cut. The initiation stunt is under
investigation.
AND THIS YEAR'S WINNER OF THE DARWIN AWARD . .
The late John Pernicky and his friend, the late Sal Hawkins, of the
great state of Washington. The two friends decided to attend a local
Metallica concert at the George Washington amphitheater. Having no
tickets (but having had 18 beers between them), they thought it would
be easy to "hop" over the nine foot fence and sneak into the show.
They pulled their pickup truck over to the fence and the plan was for
Mr. Pernicky, who was 100-pounds heavier than Mr. Hawkins, to hop
the fence and then assist his friend over. Unfortunately for Mr.
Pernicky,
there was a 30-foot drop on the other side of the fence. Having heaved
himself over, he found himself crashing through a tree. His fall was
abruptly halted (and broken, along with his arm) by a large branch that
snagged him by his shorts. Dangling from the tree with a broken arm,
he looked down and saw some bushes below him. Possibly figuring the
bushes would break his fall, he removed his pocket knife and proceeded
to cut away his shorts to free himself from the tree. Once free, Mr.
Pernicky
fell into the holly bushes below. The sharp leaves scratched his
entire body
and worse, without the protection of his shorts, a holly branch
penetrated
his rectum. To make matters still worse, on landing, his pocket knife
penetrated his thigh. Mr. Hawkins, seeing his friend in considerable
pain
and agony, threw him a rope intending to pull him to safety by tying
the
rope to the pickup truck and slowly driving away. However, in his
drunken
condition, Mr. Hawkins put the truck into reverse and crashed through
the fence,
landing 30 feet below atop his friend, killing him. Police arrived to
find the
crashed pickup, its driver thrown 100 feet from the truck and dead
from
massive internal injuries. Upon removing the truck, they found Mr.
Pernicky
under it, half-naked, scratches all over his body, a holly branch in
his rectum,
a knife in his thigh, and his shorts dangling from a tree branch 25
feet in the air.
Congratulations, gentlemen.