(My father, an Irishman, told me that the reputation of the Scots for being stingy began with a Scots vaudeville comedian in the 1920s named Harry Lauder. {I had asked about it at an early age because our Scots family friends were the soul of generosity. Nonetheless -being Irish I enjoy insulting the Scots. It's in our genes)

An American visitor to an Aberdeen pub is surprised to find that beer is only two pence a pint. The barman explains that it is in honor of the pub's one hundreth anniversary.

The American glances aropund and sees that the bar is empty.He asks: " Don't the regular customers get the same special price?"

The barman explains: " They're waiting for Happy Hour".