Remember folks. Street lights timed for 35 mph are also timed for 70 mph.

Did you get a not-so-gentle reminder in the mail?

quote:

Originally posted by Rusty Marlin:
Did you get a not-so-gentle reminder in the mail?

Fortunately no. I don't speed anymore. Burned my life's worth of cop luck several years ago.

I had gotten off the Natchez Trace (awesome drive btw) into Jackson, Mississippi. There was some construction and traffic was heavy. Finally we get past the construction, but the traffic does not thin out.

Being the take charge kind of guy I am, I gunned it up to 80 (55 mph zone) and weaved in and out to get ahead to ease the congestion.

Well, there was this cop on the other side of the highway.

I thought, "There's no way he's going to come after me."

His lights came on.

I thought, "There's no way he's going to jump that ditch to come after me."

He jumps the ditch.

"Damn!"

So, since the police officer is so far away and I'm coming to a small hill I decide to gun it. Hit about 100 mph.

Why, I don't know.

I saw an exit and decided to slow down and take it. I was still going so fast I couldn't manage to stop at the intersection. I was LUCKY nothing was coming. Couldn't make the turn so continued ahead...back onto the freeway.

Damn!

Wait a minute! There's the cop that was chasing after me...two cars in FRONT of me. I drop down to about 50 mph and watch him.

I could tell he was mad and cussing. He eventually pulled over a pickup, I guess cause he just had to get somebody at that point.

I drove by him at a nice leisurely pace.

Right then and there, I decided never again. All the luck in the world I would ever had, I had just burned it all up.

Obviously the posters here are hardened, experienced lawbreakers. I'm not accustomed to such criminal company. (The best I ever achieved was (years ago) to figure out that the lights on Park Avenue in NY City were set for 23 mph uptown and 25 mph downtown from one block to another)

That's better than my "runs". One I ducked behind a church; the Lord looked out for me that day!
And the other I managed to get into a buddies garage and slam the door just in time to watch The sheriff go by. That was FUNNY!

Both of these were with a '82 Ford F100, you'd think I drove it like a sports car or somthing

I can't confirm it, but two stories a good friend of mine told me are as follows:

Story 1:
----------------------
He was in a rented Lincoln towncar back in the late 70s, maybe early 80s, driving along the Mass. pike, and speeding a little, but not terribly so.

With the cruise-control set. His back propped against the driver's side door, hit shoes off and his socked feet leisurely propped in the passenger's seat, steering with his left hand, and casually sipping his bottle of Jack Daniels in his right hand ...

when he hears this voice coming over a klaxon-like loudspeaker right beside him... He immediately whips around to a 10 & 2 position, looks over and driving next to him is a Mass. State Trooper.

The trooper is sneering in disquest and says something else to him, before passing him and heading on down the road.


==========================================
And his other story ... from years ago. Again, I can't personally confirm it - but I don't doubt him.
(names withheld and/or changed to protect my friend ... but not his story ... )

This one was again back in the 70s.

The story starts with him waking up one morning to a POUNDING noise throughout the house.

He opens his eyes and his exact words were "It was like someone drove a white-hot railroad spike straight into my brain."

Then he remembered winning the martini drinking contest the night before, after polishing off about 25 or so martinis for the win.

The pounding continued, so he got up, and immediately noticed he was totally naked ... and he doesn't sleep naked. So, he grabbed his wife's robe from beside the bed and walked downstairs to see what was pounding on his door.

He opened the door a crack, he saw a uniformed police officer standing there. The officer said "Mr. (name withheld), is this your wallet?"

"Yes, yes officer, that's my wallet, thank you for bringing it to me."

"Not a problem, sir. One more question, are, ah, are those your clothes?"

And the officer pointed out towards the yard.

He looked out into his yard and saw a line of clothes going across the lawn: shoes, shirt, pants, T-shirt, underwear, socks ... and that it was clear from where the clothes were that he was totally nude WELL before he reached his front door.

"Yes officer, yes, those are my clothes."

"Mr. Nnnnnnn, what happened, was it just really hot or something last night?"

"Oh yes officer, I was hot last night, I was tired - I guess all I wanted to do was get home and go to bed."

"Ok Mr. Nnnnnn, let me ask you one last question, is that - your car?" And the officer pointed towards the neighbor's yard."

My friend looked over and could clearly see the back end of his Porsche crashed THROUGH the front wall of the neighbor's house, the wall bused in, and the car resting in their living room. Luckily his neighbors were on vacation and nobody was hurt.

"Ah yes officer, that's my car."

"So what happened? Did it lock up, or the brakes go out or you have a blowout or something?"

"The brakes went out officer, there was nothing I could do, I tried to stop."

At this point the officer calls him by his first name.

"Wwwww, stop. Do you even know who I am ??"

"Yes, you're a police man."

"Wwwww, it's me, Chris!"

("Chris" was a police officer, but also happened to be his sister's husband (of many years))

(Joyfully exhuberant) "Chris! Oh Chris, how are you, how's "sister" and the kids?"

"Wwwwww. Are you going to take care of this mess?"

"Oh yeah Chris, don't worry about that, I'll have it cleaned up by this afternoon - I'll cover everything."

"All right, Wwwww, get back to sleep, you're trashed."


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He has other stories too, like the times he used to be a fighter-pilot in the air-force out in the mid-west in his younger days and they'd fly along over train tracks until they saw a train, then bank around miles down the track, get right over the track and turn on one landing light and start flying back down the track towards the oncoming train with 1 light on and veer off at the last minute. He said you could see sparks flying like mad from those train tracks.

... or when he signed government clearance agreements for the Air Force, but only after meticulously crossing out anything having to do with not revealing information "even if tortured."

He was a trip, and he had some great stories.