How to speak about WOMEN and be politically correct:

1) She is not a "BABE" or a "CHICK" - She is a "BREASTED AMERICAN"
2) She is not a "SCREAMER" or a "MOANER" - She is "VOCALLY APPRECITIVE"
3) She is not "EASY" - She is "HORAZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE"
4) She is not a "DUMB BLONDE" - She is a "LIGHT-HAIRED DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY"
5) She Has not "BEEN AROUND" - She is a "PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION"
6) She is not an "AIRHEAD" - She is "REALITY IMPAIRED"
7) She does not get "DRUNK" or "TIPSY" - She gets "CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED"
8) She does not have "BREAST IMPLANTS" - She is "MEDICALLY ENHANCED"
9) She does not "NAG" - She becomes "VERBALLY REPETITIVE"
10)She is not a "TRAMP" - She is "SEXUALLY EXTROVERTED"
11)She does not have "MAJOR LEAGUE HOOTERS" - She is "PECTORALLY SUPERIOR"
12)She is not a "TWO-BIT HOOKER" - She is a "LOW COST PROVIDER"

How to speak about MEN and be politically correct:

1) He does not have a "BEER GUT" - He has developed a "LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY"
2) He is not a "BAD DANCER" - He is "OVERLY CAUCASIAN"
3) He does not "GET LOST ALL THE TIME" - He "INVESITGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS"
4) He is not "BALDING" - He is in "FOLLICLE REGRESSION"
5) He is not a "CRADLE ROBBER" - He prefers " GENERATIONAL DEFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS"
6) He does not get "FALLING DOWN DRUNK" - He becomes "ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL"
7) He does not have his "HEAD UP HIS ASS" - He developes a case of "RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION"
8) He is not a "MALE CHAUVINIST PIG" - He has "SWINE EMPATHY"
9) He is not afraid of "COMMITMENT" - He has "MARRIAGE DEFICT DISORDER"
10)He is not "HORNY" - He is "SEXUALLY FOCUSED"
11)It is not his "CRACK" you see hanging out of his pants - It's "REAR CLEAVAGE"

I think it was Mark Twain who said it best, the mark of an uneducated man is using two words where one will do.... Gotta love the PC movement...

John

PC movement? Is the the politically correct way to now say bowel movement?
Paul B.