Man went to the doctor with a sore shoulder. Dr gave him a specimen bottle and said he needed a urine sample. Guy thought what a quack. Urine sample for a sore shoulder. I'll fix him. So he took jar home and had his daughter make a urine deposit. Same with his wife. Then he took the dip stick out of his car an added some oil. Then he pleasured himself and added that. Took sample jar to dr. Doctor analyzed it and told him to come into his office and set down. Doctor said "you've got problems". Your daughter is pregnant. Your wife is having an affair. Your car is about to throw a rod, and if you don't quit playing with yourself, your shoulder will never quit hurting.

True story here. A fellow worker on the job told this over lunch on the slab at noon. Seems he + the wife wife were trying but no conception was happening so he goes to the Dr. to get a sperm sample done.Well,he's in the bathroom with the nurse right outside + he could'nt do it + told the doc that.The Dr. says no problem,just lean over the exam table + hold the test tube in place + I'll do the rest.He said the doc stuck his finger up his ass + stroked the muscles right above his balls + he shot off into the vial. And then he said,you know the worst part about that? I liked it.We all liked to chocked on our sandwiches.