Helping the homeless

I was walking down the street when I was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked me for a couple of dollars for dinner.

I took out my wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked, "If I give you this money, will you buy some beer with it instead of dinner?"

He answered "No, I had to stop drinking years ago."

"Will you use this money to go fishing instead of buying food?" I asked.

"No, I don't waste time fishing, " the homeless man said.."I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive."

"Will you spend this on hunting equipment?" I asked.

"Are you NUTS!?" replied the homeless man. "I haven't gone hunting in 20 years!"

"Well," I said. "I'm not going to give you money. Instead, I'm going to take you home for a shower, a chance to wash your clothes and a terrific dinner cooked by my wife."

The homeless man was astounded. "Won't your wife be furious with you for doing that?"

I replied "Don't worry about that. It's important for her to see what a man looks like after he has given up drinking, fishing and hunting."

Was accosted in Vegas, for a "donation" to some society helping poor Seniors. Told him, we don't have those in Canada. We just put them out on the ice in a little igloo and that's it. Guy went ballistic, actually believed me.

Grizz

I don't know about everywhere else but Austin seems to have become the Mecca for the homeless.Just about every street corner has a begger.Brother in law works for the highway dept. + the state troopers told them they needed to collect these folks crap where they have just taken a dump.Tommy told them under no circumstances was he picking up their shit. Let the law get them to move on. There are NO bums in Georgetown just up the road. Hitchhikers either. Cops pick them up + move them past the city limits.

Don't have many beggars around here every once in a great while one shows up.

Now down in Yuma AZ they are around for sure.

quote:

Originally posted by NormanConquest:
I don't know about everywhere else but Austin seems to have become the Mecca for the homeless.Just about every street corner has a begger.Brother in law works for the highway dept. + the state troopers told them they needed to collect these folks crap where they have just taken a dump.Tommy told them under no circumstances was he picking up their shit. Let the law get them to move on. There are NO bums in Georgetown just up the road. Hitchhikers either. Cops pick them up + move them past the city limits.

Come to california, especially Los Angeles. The entire city smells like urine.

Come to San Diego we have a Hep.A epidemic from them dowm here.

The joke was great!

Yes it was. Sorry to get off track.