70-year-old George went for his annual physical. All of his tests came back with normal results. Dr. Smith said, "George, everything looks great physically. How are you doing mentally and emotionally? Are you at peace with yourself, and do you have a good relationship with your God?"

George replied, "God and me are tight. He knows I have poor eyesight, so he's fixed it so that when I get up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom (poof!) the light goes on when I pee, and then (poof!) the light goes off when I'm done."

"Wow," commented Dr. Smith, "that's incredible!"

A little later in the day Dr. Smith called George's wife. "Thelma," he said, "George is just fine. Physically he's great. But I had to call because I'm in awe of his relationship with God. Is it true that he gets up during the night and (poof!) the light goes on in the bathroom, and then (poof!) the light goes off?"

Thelma exclaimed, "That old fool! He's peeing in the refrigerator again!"


Okay gerald, tell me you laughed at that one.

I would give 10 "smilies" but I understand that the "Rules" of the internet only allow 6.

Now, British, you,indeed, kept up your end! (BTW, please check your PM a little while later. I have a very unpolitically correct joke I think you may appreciate)

DITTO!!!

Marterious and Shane

I was afraid to have somebody take real offense and then the good humor in this thread would disappear. It was a joke about Irish/English relations in Northern Ireland. British has not given me any response so I'm now afraid I have offended him. That's bad enough but at least I won't have offended a whole lot of people by posting it publicly. No kidding, guys, I enjoy this thread too much to jeopardize it by posting what is really a political joke about the Irish and the Brits - and now, on reflection, maybe not so funny.

Hey gerald, no offence taken here. I enjoyed reading what you sent.

British:

Thanks for saving my reputation! BTW, (since the forum objects to my concealing Irish/English jokes, I remembered a story (perhaps apocryphal) about Michael Collins, the Irish nationalist (you say "rebel") An English officer expressed surprise because Collins had state his admiration and even liking for the English. The British officer asked why then was he fighting against England. Collins replied: " I like and admire the English. It's your damned British Empire that I hate!". (Yes, British, needless to say it was the "Empire" in Ireland that he opposed. A lot of Irish took the "Queen's shilling" and upheld her word in many far reaches of the world)