I am a sick old man.

I was sick and in the hospital.

There was one nurse that just drove me crazy.

Every time she came in, she would talk to me like I was a little child.

She would say in a patronizing tone of voice,

'And how are we doing this morning',



Or 'Are we ready for a bath', or 'Are we hungry?'

I had had enough of this particular nurse.

One day, at breakfast, I took the apple juice off the tray and put it in my bed side stand.

Later, I was given a urine bottle to fill for testing.

So you know where the juice went!



The nurse came in a little later, picked up the urine bottle and looked at it.

'My, it seems we are a little cloudy today.'

At this, I snatched the bottle out of her hand, popped off the top, and drank it down, saying, 'Well, I'll run it through again. Maybe I can filter it better this time.'
The nurse fainted...

...I just smiled.



DON'T MESS WITH 'OLD' PEOPLE!!

Good bud went into surgery a couple of years back. Went in to visit him upon entry. He had just left the bath,while saying the entire time during his soap bath, "I am thinking about the faucet,I am thinking about the soap dish, etc.