A girl went to her mother and cried" Momma i cant keep a man!"
The mother replied"Come in the kitchen let me teach you something......."
The mother got a can of biscuits out of the icebox ,whacked them on the counter,took one out,threw it on the floor,splat! Then she proceded to pull up her dress squat over the biscuit and pick it up with no hands.
The mother said" Now you practice that and when you get good at it you can keep your man"
Weeks went by
Then one saturday night the daughter was in the sack with a new dude.
She said "oh wait i have something to show you!"
In she comes with a can of biscuits, whacks it on the bed post,pulls one out,throws it on the floor,splat! She hikes up her leg and squats in for the biscuit when out rips a big fart. Knowing surely her future lover would be mortified she looks up to apologize. "i'm sorry" she says......
He said "oh nawww if it'll growl like that at a biscuit, lets see what it'll do with a peice of meat!"