Ole goes to work one day and a Swede notices he has a black eye. "ba-golly Ole, whut hoppened toyer eye?"
"Well" Ole says, "you know my freind Sven is in town, and when he is town he wants to go to church, So I up and takes him to church dis Sunday. Well, wouldn't you know it but a big black woman comes and sets right smack in front of us. When we gots up to sing, I seen her dress was stuck up the crack of her ass, so bein the gentleman that I am I reached over the pew and gently tugged it out and she did not like that as she turned around and hit me eye"
They had a bit of a laugh about it and went on about their day.
The next monday Swede see's Ole and Ole is beat to shit. "ba-golly Ole, whut in da world hoppened to ya dis time?"
"well" say's Ole "Ol Sven wonted to go to church again, and jess like afore, this big black woman comes and sets right in front of us agin. When we gots up to sing her dress was once agin stuck up her crack. Sven, bein the gentleman he is, reached over and pulled it out. I knew she didn't like that so I shoved it right back in"

Ouch! Groan! I live in Seattle. Ve got lots of Scandihuvians here. And we luv 'em all!
Brice

That's ALMOST pulpit material!