I could find nothing to validate or negate this story but
it is great and I would like to believe that it is true.
Subject: Marine Corp Etiquette

The Commandant of the Marine Corps was General Al Gray, a
crusty old "Field Marine." He loved his Marines and often
slipped into the mess hall wearing a faded old field jacket
without any rank insignia on it. He would go through the
chow line just like a private. (In this way, assured of
being given the same rations that the lowest enlisted man
received. And, woe be it to the mess officer if the food
was found to be "unfit in quality or quantity.) Upon
becoming Commandant, General Gray was expected to do a great
deal of "formal entertaining," fancy dinner parties in full
dress blue uniform. Now, the general would rather have been
in the field eating cold "C-rats" around a fighting hole
with a bunch of young "hard charging" Marines. But the
General knew his duty, and as a Marine he was determined to
do it to the best of his ability.

During these formal parties a detachment of highly
polished Marines from "Eighth and Eye" (Marine Barracks
located at 8th and I Streets in Washington, D.C., home of
the Silent Drill Team) were detailed to assume the position
of "parade rest" at various intervals around the ballroom
where the festivities were being held.

At some point during one of these affairs, a very refined,
big-chested, blue-haired lady picked up a tray of pastry and
went around the room offering confections to the guests.
When she noticed these Marines in dress blues, standing like
sculptures all around the room, she was moved with
admiration.

She knew that several of these men were fresh from our
victory in Desert Storm. She made a beeline for the closest
Lance Corporal, drew near him and asked, "Would you like
pastry young man?"

The young Marine snapped to "attention" and replied, "I
don't eat that shit, Ma'am." Just as quickly, he resumed the
position of "parade rest." His gaze remained fixed on some
distant point throughout the exchange.

The fancy lady was completely taken aback! She blinked,
her eyes widened, her mouth dropped open. So startled was
she that she immediately began to doubt what she had heard.
In a quivering voice she asked, "W-W-What did you say?"

The Marine snapped back to the position of "attention"
(like the arm of a mousetrap smacking it's wooden base).
Then he said, "I don't eat that shit, Ma'am." And just as
smartly as before, back to the position of "parade rest" he
went.

This time, there was no doubt. The fancy lady immediately
became incensed, and felt insulted. After all, here she was
an important lady, taking the time to offer something nice
to this enlisted man (well below her station in life), and
he had the nerve to say THAT to HER!

She exclaimed, "Well! I never...!" The lady remembered
that she had met "that military man in charge of all these
'soldiers' earlier. She spotted General Gray from across
the room. He had a cigar clenched between his teeth and a
camouflaged canteen cup full of bourbon in his left hand.
He was talking to a group of 1st and 2nd Lieutenants. So
blue haired lady went straight over to the Commandant and
interrupted.

"General, I offered some pastry to that young man over
there. And, do you know what he told me?"

General Gray cocked his eyebrow, took the cigar out of his
mouth and said, "Well, no Ma'am, I don't."

The lady took in a deep breath, confident that she was
adequately expressing with her body language her
considerable rage and indignation. As she wagged her head
in cadence with her words, and she paused between each word
for effect, "He said, 'I - don't
- eat - that - shit - Ma'am!'"

The lieutenants were in a state of near apoplexy A couple
of them choked back chuckles, and turned their heads to
avoid having their smirks detected.

The next thought that most of them had was, "God, I hope
it wasn't one of MY Marines!" and the color left their
faces.

General Gray wrinkled his brow, cut his eyes in the
direction of the lieutenants, put his free hand to his chin
and muttered a subdued, "Hummm. Which one did you say it
was Ma'am?," the General asked.

"That tall sturdy one right over there near the window,
General," the woman said with smug satisfaction.

One of the lieutenants began to look sick and put a hand
on the wall for support. General Gray, seemed deep in
thought, hand still to his chin, wrinkled brow. Suddenly,
he looked up and his _expression changed to one indicating
he had made a decision. He looked the fancy lady right in
the eyes and said, "Well, fuck him! Don't give him any."

absolutely F#*#ING perfect!!!!

I think I've met both the blue haired lady and the General before ....

And oh yeah, I remember Lt's like that...

Ken....

semper fi