A man sleeps with an oriental girl. A few days later while taking a shower, he notices he has a green rash on his vitals. Of course,he immediately consults a doctor who tells him that he has contracted a rare oriental disease and that his entire manhood will have to be amputated. He insists on consulting another doctor - who gives him the same diagnosis.

he leaves the doctor in despair and just as he is about to throw himself off a bridge he meets a friend. He tells the friend the story of what has happened. The friend being smart tells him: " You're going about this all the wrong way. You've been told you have this "rare oriental disease" so you should see an Oriental doctor". He sends him to this old Chinese doctor. The old Chinese doctor examines the guy and then looks at him with a kindly smile.The guy feels better already.

"Doctor, does it have to be amputated?" The old Chinese doctor gives his kindly smile again and says:

"Of course not. In a few days, it'll fall off by itself!".

Ah, the infamous Hong Kong Dong.
Pete

gerald416,
I remember in basic training the drill sergeants used to try and scare all us young and gullible privates that there were STD's out there that would turn "Mr. Happy" black and it would fall off. They also used to say that certain ethnic groups carried a particular disease and you would get quarantined on a special island for the rest of your life if you cought it. The sad part is most of us fell for it. Right up until that first overnight off base pass.

Bill:

I keep telling you that you guys in today's Army have it easy. In my day (around 1949) they showed us these black and white films of what was supposed to be the end result of gonorrhea and syphilis. It's a testimony to the power of the sex drive that us 18-19 year olds were sickened - for about half an hour. We told each other that the films were doctored.

Things havent changed much. GI's still find some way to rationalise a quickie. I have seen a few soldiers here who snuck across the border to Juarez for a trip to the establishments there who came home with a little present from their little visit that required a trip to the doctor.

Bill:

The real "wise guys" also told us that if you rubbed tobacco juice on her privates and she didn't wince, that meant she was "clean". (Needless to say, these guys never explained where 18-19 year olds who didn't chew tobacco were supposed to have tobacco juice on hand. Of course,we also were not smart enough to ask!)

You mentioned "Juarez". Is that Ciudad Juarez? I was never there but a brother of mine took advanced infantry training in WW2 at what was then Camp Polk (LA)and he mentioned being there. Funny! He assured my mother that it was a lovely city and he liked the old Spanish architecture.

Gerald,
I believe that Juarez and Juarez Cuidad to be one and the same. Not 100% sure though. From what locals have told Juarez used to be a very nice town. Fairly impoverished but full of the old Spanish architecture and a tiny fraction of its size today. NAFTA pushed a lot of the factories across the border looking for cheaper labor (average factory worker in Juarez makes $70 a week). With the huge insugrance of workers and their families also came the heavy crime element. Now drugs and prostitution run rampant. Not to mention the 300+ girls who have been found murdered there over the last 7 years. Went from a sleepy little town to a hell hole overnight.

When your brother was there it was most likely a very nice place to visit. Even Tiajuana was pretty mellow back then from what I hear.

Juarez now is off limits because too many Joes went looking for a fling and found big trouble instead and either got rolled or in jail. So now they sneak across and still get rolled or in jail.

Bill:

What I meant as a joking post (on the assumption that my brother went looking for girls in Ciudad Juarez and not much old Spanish architecture) and your reply has given all of us Americans, a shocking picture -and a very bad one. (I really think that most of us in the US far removed from the border don't understand the picture. (In my day, the MPs declared some bars off limits because the owner "took" young recruits (and I mean bars right next to a US Army post in the USA - and the ACLU wasn't even heard of then. I guess on the assumption that the US Army had a right to protect its own. Now it seems to be a case of saving our guys from a hell of a lot worse. I know this is a "Humor" thread but it's good that the rest of the country understands some realities.