Yesterday Peggy asked why I didn't do something useful with my time.

She suggested I go down to the seniors' center and hang out with the guys.

I did this and when I got home last night I told her that I had joined a Parachute Club.

She said "Are you nuts? You're 65 years old and you're going to start jumping out of airplanes?

I proudly showed her that I even got a membership card!

She said to me, "You idiot! Where are your glasses? This is a membership to a Prostitute Club, not a Parachute Club!"

I'm in trouble again and don't know what to do! I signed up for five jumps a week!

Life as a senior citizen is not getting any easier!

If you can handle 5 jumps a week at 65, whether out of an airplane or onto a woman, you don't need glasses.