I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ
so much, and I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing.
I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with
their heart.

One evening last week, billy and his wife were getting
into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually
says, "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me." he said "WHAT??!! What was that?!"
So she says the words that every husband on the planet dreads to
hear... "You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman
enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded
to his puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love Me for who I am and not
what I do for you in the bedroom?"

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, he went to sleep.

The next day billy opted to take the day off work to spend time with her.
They went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big
unnamed department store. He walked around with her while she tried on
several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one
to take so he told her he would just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to
compliment her new clothes, so he said lets get a pair for each outfit. They
went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond
earrings. Let me tell you . . . she was so excited. She must have thought he
was one wave short of a shipwreck. billy started to think she was testing him
because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to
play tennis.
She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.
Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier."
Billy could hardly contain himself when he blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, "WHAT?"
He then said, "honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man, enough for
me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." Just when she had this look like she was going to kill him,He added,
"Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"
Apparently billy was not not having sex that night either.