The best lawyer story of all time . . . bar none.

The United Way realized that it had never received a donation from the city's most successful lawyer.

So a United Way volunteer paid the lawyer a
visit in his lavish office.

The volunteer opened the meeting by
saying, "Our research shows that even though your annual
income is over two million dollars, you don't
give a penny to charity. Wouldn't you like to give
something back to your community through
the United Way?"


The lawyer thinks for a minute and says,
"First, did your research also show you that my mother
is dying after a long, painful illness and she
has huge medical bills that are far beyond her ability to pay?"

Embarrassed, the United Way rep mumbles, "Uh . . .
no, I didn't know that."

"Secondly," says the lawyer,
"did it show that my brother, a disabled veteran, is blind
and confined to a wheelchair and is unable to support his
wife and six children?"


The stricken United Way rep begins to stammer an
apology, but is cut off again.

"Thirdly, did your research also show you that my sister's husband died in dreadful car accident, leaving her penniless with a mortgage and three children, one of whom is disabled and another who has learning
disabilities requiring an array of private tutors?"
The humiliated United Way rep, completely beaten,says, "I'm so sorry, I had no idea."


And the lawyer says,
"So . . . if I didn't give any money to them, what makes you think I'd give any to you?"