Two men are on a fishing boat.
The captain of the boat askes his mate if he would like a cigar. The mate says he would love one. So the captain tells him to open the hatch to the hold, and grab one from the box.
The mate opens up the hatch door and peers into total darkness. The captain tells him to use the lighter thats sitting there on the self next to the hatch door.
The mate pulls out the biggest lighter he's ever seen, and askes the captain where the hell he got such a big lighter.
The captain tells him that it's a long story and a sore subject, but will tell him about it sometime.
So the mate lights the lighter and see's a big brass bottle. He grabs it and asks the captain where he got it. The captain says, thats a genie bottle and tells him not to rub it, as the Genie is deaf as a stump, and just an old senial idiot.
So the first thing the mate does of course is rub the bottle. Out pops an old grey haired genie. The genie say's " well by golly, you've let me out of the bottle, and you get one wish'!
The mate instantly without much thinking tells the genie he wants a million bucks.
The genie says, " you got it', and pops back into the bottle.
Suddenly the sky opens up and thousands and thousands of ducks begin dropping from the sky, hammering him and the captain.
After a few minutes of being pelted by ducks, the mate exclains that the genie was a dumb ass as he had asked him for a million bucks, not a million ducks!
The captain in return exclamed, 'Tell me about it; you think I asked for a ten inch Bic?

The MC at my wedding used that to introduce the Best Man. Classic.