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(Begun as a fictional list, but the real "Only in Americas" are funnier, or at least stranger) Drive-through banks, pharmacies, and liquor stores. Parking lots (car parks) larger than the buildings they serve. Sugar-frosted honey-coated deep-fat-fried cheese sticks - and a Diet Coke. Bumper stickers that say "Honk if you hate noise pollution". Creationists who insist that the pharmaceutical drugs they use first be tested on monkeys and chimps. Football in which the ball is carried or propelled much more by hand than by foot. People who argue that human life is so sacred that abortion justifies capital punishment. A country where the "Lower Forty-eight" states are north of Hawaii, and where the "Continental U.S" doesn't include Alaska, which is clearly on the same continent. A country where everyone has time to mow their three-acre lawn each week, but no one has time to cook their own food. People who value equality so much that they think discrimination should be used to create it. Academic institutions known more for their athletes than their scholars. A country where the Big Ten has eleven schools, and a fifth is four fifths of a quart. A country where "evil-doer" and "do-gooder" are both negative characterizations. A country that claims to hate lawyers, and that elects only lawyers to public office. Prices of gasoline (petrol) prices that are a fraction of the price of drinking water - and people complaining about the price of gasoline. A State Department that has nothing to do with the states. "In God We Trust" written on every piece of money of a nation that alleges to separate church and state. A country where only the well-to-do ride bicycles. One of the world's most technologically advanced countries, with the most antiquated system of weights and measures. "The Land of the Free" with the world's second highest incarceration rate. Explanation A principled refusal to ratify the 1989 United Nations Convention on the Rights of the Child. (Somalia is the only other nation with the same principles.) | ||
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Don't forget: the richest and most powerful country in the world... Unlike the Ukraine province of Russia... | |||
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No way, Dude! Alaska is it's own Continent. | |||
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Lol! Not many people mow their own yard anymore | |||
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A quart is 1/4 gallon. 4/5 of a quart is 4/5 X 1/4 = 1/5 of a gallon. It's math, something we do well in America. Jon Larsson - Hunter - Shooter - Reloader - Mostly in that order... | |||
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Fuck me Edmond You just won't quit will ya? " Until the day breaks and the nights shadows flee away " Big ivory for my pillow and 2.5% of Neanderthal DNA flowing thru my veins. When I'm ready to go, pack a bag of gunpowder up my ass and strike a fire to my pecker, until I squeal like a boar. Yours truly , Milan The Boarkiller - World according to Milan PS I have big boar on my floor...but it ain't dead, just scared to move... Man should be happy and in good humor until the day he dies... Only fools hope to live forever “ Hávamál” | |||
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Unfortunately, Sums up today's US in a nut shell. Grizz Indeed, no human being has yet lived under conditions which, considering the prevailing climates of the past, can be regarded as normal. John E Pfeiffer, The Emergence of Man Those who can't skin, can hold a leg. Abraham Lincoln Only one war at a time. Abe Again. | |||
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Not all of us! Never mistake motion for action. | |||
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