An American girl was visiting England and was invited to a party. While dancing with a stuffy mono-cycled Englishman, her necklace became unfastened and slipped down the back of her dress. She asked the Englishman to retrieve the jewelry piece for her. He was very embarrassed, but wishing to comply with her request, he reached cautiously down the back of her gown. “I’m terribly sorry,” he said, “but I can’t seem to reach it.” She told him, “Try further down.” At this point, he noticed that he was being watched by everyone in the room which made him feel most uncomfortable and he whispered to the girl, ”I feel such a perfect ass.” She said, “Never mind that! Just get the damn necklace.”

Imagine how much more readable that might have been with English punctuation......

Speaking of the punctuation, that reminds me of the one about Prince Charles + Camilla's wedding night. They had been parade all day with her wearing new shoes + by nightfall, she was exhausted + her feet hurt. She asked Charles to remove her shoes. In the next-door chamber, the regent Phillip was listening with his ear to the wall. He hears Charles when working on the 1st shoe say "By Jove this is tight." Phillip just chuckles + says, of course with a face like that she has to be a virgin. The Charles goes to remove the 2nd shoe + says, "I say, this ones tighter than the other." Phillip just chuckles
+ says, "Yes once a navy man always a navy man."