A sign in a shoe repair store:
"We will heel you. We will save your sole. We will even dye for you."

A sign on a blinds and curtain truck:
"Blind man driving."

Sign over a Gynecologist's Office:
"Dr. Jones, at your cervix."

In a Podiatrist's office:
"Time wounds all heels."

On a Septic Tank Truck:
"Yesterday's Meals on Wheels."

At an Optometrist's Office:
"If you don't see what you're looking for,You've come to the right place."

On a Plumber's truck:
"We repair what your husband fixed."

On another Plumber's truck:
"Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber."

At a Tire Shop:
"Invite us to your next blowout."

On an Electrician's truck:
"Let us remove your shorts."

In a Non-smoking Area:
"If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and will take appropriate action."

On a Maternity Room door:
"Push. Push. Push."

At a Car Dealership:
"The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment."

Outside a Muffler Shop:
"No appointment necessary. We hear you coming."

In a Veterinarian's waiting room:
"Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"

At the Electric Company:
"We would be delighted if you send in your payment on time. However, if you don't, YOU will be de-lighted."

In a Restaurant window:
"Don't stand there and be hungry; come on in and get fed up."

In the front yard of a Funeral Home:
"Drive carefully. We'll wait."

At a Propane Filling Station:
"Thank Heaven for little grills."

In a Radiator Shop:
"Best place in town to take a leak."

On the back of another Septic Tank Truck:
"Caution - This Truck is full of political promises."

As to the Madison Avenue boys, here's a true story of quick thinking + quick profit. I'm sure everyone remembers their mother's old wooden handled potatoes peeler that was painted red; everyone had one. That was because it was the best thing on the market. It was so good that they had a contract with the U.S. government to supply peelers to all the kitchens. But even with the high sales + quality product they were going broke + couldn't understand it, so they called this Madison Ave wizard + his cure to the problem at the tune of 10K was to stop painting the handles red. BIG LIGHT BULB IDEA HERE! You get a grunt on K.P. peeling a mountain of spuds + he puts the peeler down for a minute in the peelings + it's lost (unless you have a RED handle to differentiate from the other peelings. His advice was to stop painting the handles. Cost them 10K but saved the company.

On local oil well down hole service trucks "Your hole is our goal.".