A guy walks into a bar with a pet monkey.
He orders a drink and while he's drinking it
the monkey jumps all around all over the
place. The monkey grabs some olives off
the bar and eats them, then grabs some
sliced limes and eats them, then jumps up
on the pool table, grabs the cue ball, sticks
it in his mouth and swallows it whole.

The bartender screams at the guy, "Did
you see what your monkey just did?"

The guy says, "No, what?"

"He just ate the cue ball off of my pool
table, whole!", say the bartender.

"Yeah, that doesn't suprise me," replies
the patron, "he eats everything in sight,
the little bastard. I'll pay for the cue ball
and stuff." He then finishes his drink,
pays his bill, and leaves.

Two weeks later he's in the bar again,
and he has his monkey with him. He
orders a drink and the monkey starts
running around the bar again. While the
man is drinking his drink, the monkey
finds a maraschino cherry on the bar. He
grabs it, sticks it up his butt, pulls it out,
and eats it...

The bartender is disgusted. "Did you see
what your monkey did now?", he asks.

"Now what?", responds the patron.

"Well, he stuck a maraschino cherry up
his butt, then pulled it out and ate it!, says
the barkeep.

"Yeah, that doesn't suprise me," replied the
patron. "He still eats everything in sight, but
ever since he ate that damn cue ball he
measures everything first!"