The Accurate Reloading Forums
Famous Old Sayings
21 December 2003, 16:35
Pecos41Famous Old Sayings
I know a lady who continually tries to exibit her wit and wisdom by injecting famous sayings. Only problem is she never gets these sayings correct. Here are a few of her favorite bloopers as an example:
Quote:
Kill one bird with two stones. Eat that elephant one leg at a time. Treat him like a step-headed red child.
You get the idea. 
I should like to enlist all you clever guys to help me create some ammunition to fire back at her. I feel it my Christian duty to counter this trend.....or shall we say "Nip this bud in the trend." 
Help, help. Take your favorite old sayings and using craft and excessive subtlety, help me fill my chest with remarks guaranteed to mess with the weakest mind. The sneakier the perversion, the better.
21 December 2003, 17:31
DirtfarmerYou should leave no turn unstoned in your quest for clever come-backs.
21 December 2003, 17:50
FordfreakPecos,
Never forget the early worm catches the bird.
Fordfreak
21 December 2003, 17:54
dentonDeveloped in the Department of Redundancy Department.
21 December 2003, 18:23
BlackHawk1I'm here therefore I am, I think.
21 December 2003, 21:29
k2 in orygunreal fart smeller or better yet, a real fairy fart smeller for what ever its worth. k2 in orygun
22 December 2003, 02:49
pahandgunhunterWell, the early bird may get the worm. BUT............
the second mouse gets the cheese.
22 December 2003, 03:11
120mmWe have a complete moron in our organization who does the same thing. "We need to put our shoulder to the grindstone, and our nose to the wheel." Or, anyone who has amnesia needs to clean their ears out. What a moron.
"I need you all to know that you're going to have to do several things at the same time, simultaneously."
22 December 2003, 04:52
BakesPecos
People who live in glass houses.....should get undressed in the dark.
how bout.....ah the thick plottens
or to realy stuff them up this is what I do (takes some practice)when asked a question and the answer is yes, nod your head BUT say NO then walk away....this really confuses people.
22 December 2003, 06:51
GSP7Happyer than a fart in a wirlwind
22 December 2003, 10:02
GeneThe squeaking wheel gets oiled
turns into
the quacking duck gets shot.
22 December 2003, 10:37
nextupDon't sweat the petty stuff
OR
Don't pet the sweaty stuff
22 December 2003, 11:51
Matt Norman"t-shirts because motorcycles don't have doors"
22 December 2003, 19:43
Ted S.dyslexic's untie
23 December 2003, 04:10
recoiljunkyThe dirty bird gets the worm.
23 December 2003, 08:51
Pecos41Yes, lads.......this is the spirit. Keep up coming.
I'm loading my clips with these jewels. I think the idea of putting our shoulders to the grindstone is a hollow point.
24 December 2003, 11:22
GeneIf at first you don't suckseed, try try again.
24 December 2003, 17:29
Pecos41A bush in the hand is worth two birds.
24 December 2003, 20:08
Ted S.Whats that???
Its a tip tapper for making purple cat pants.
24 December 2003, 20:09
Ted S.Yah ya get that on these bigger jobs.
26 December 2003, 12:45
Richard KymbleIf you see a watermelon rolling down the road, you can bet your last dollar there'll be a chicken behind it.
I have absolutely no idea what this means, A fella at work uses this all the time when he is losing an argument
And...
You can lead a horse to water but you can't make him take a bath.
30 December 2003, 07:00
R-WESTSaw this one in the paper yesterday,
"I don't need a compass to tell me which way the wind shines."
R-WEST
30 December 2003, 09:10
HenryC470I don't recall what piece of equipment the fellow was talking about, but someone I worked with pointed out:
"This thing's seen it's last legs"
H. C.
30 December 2003, 09:13
HenryC470And until I was disabused in about my third year of graduate school, I thought the opposite of upside down" was "upside right".
H. C.
04 January 2004, 14:22
DanDMy old co-worker said this one, but it's so true.
If a turtle ends up on his back.... all his friends laugh at him.
06 January 2004, 17:04
Wildcat CrazyWhen my mother heard someone bragging or stretching the truth,she would respond with: I've heard ducks fart underwater before.
06 January 2004, 19:00
Dave JamesSome of my mother in laws favorites
Your not worth 2 cents for soap.
Sweating like a hore in church
A waist is a terrible thing to mind