I was happy. My girlfriend and I were dating for over a year, and so we
decided to get married. My parents helped us in every way, my friends
encouraged me, and my girlfriend? She was a dream!

There was only one thing bothering me, quite much indeed, and that was
my mother-in-law to be. She was a career woman, smart, but most of all
beautiful and sexy, who sometimes flirted with me, which made me feel
very uncomfortable.

One day she called me and asked me to come over to check the wedding
invitations. I went over to the house and upon arrival, she greeted me
alone, dressed revealingly, smelled fantastic, and when I entered the
house, she whispered to me, that soon I was to be married, and that she
had feelings and desires for me that she just couldn't overcome. So
before I got married and committed my life to her daughter, she wanted
to make love to me just once.

What could I say? I was in total shock, and couldn't say a word. So she
then said, "I'll go to the bedroom, and if you are up for it, just come
and get me."

I stood there for a moment, and then turned around and went to the front
door. I opened it, and stepped out of the house, there her husband was
standing just outside the door, and with tears in his eyes hugged me and
said, "We are so very happy and pleased that you have passed our little
test. We couldn't have asked for a better man for our daughter. Welcome
to the family."

Moral of the story:

Always keep your condoms in your car...

Geez, you just gave me indigestion..... Dutch.

I got gas.