Two elderly ladies are sitting on the front porch, doing nothing.

One old lady turns to the other and asks, "Do you still get horny?"

The other replies, "Oh sure I do."

The first old lady asks, "What do you do about It?"

The second old lady replies, "I suck a lifesaver."

After a few moments, the first old lady asks, "Who drives you to the beach.”

the municipal swimming pool might be closer

True story here. Many years ago the base commander's daughter came down with a case of the clap. She told the doctor that it was most likely picked up in the base public pool by "those DIRTY Marines". The doctor said that's possible but you picked one helluva place to do your screwing.

Now, that is a gudin!