> > Subject: Don't fart in bed.
> >
> >
> > If this story doesn't make you cry for laughing so hard, you
> > definitely have no sense of humor.
> >
> > This is a story about a couple who had been happily married
> > for years. The only friction in their marriage was the
> > husband's habit of farting loudly every morning when he
> > awoke. The noise would wake his wife and the smell would make
> > her eyes water and make her gasp for air.
> > Every morning she would plead with him to stop ripping them
> > off because it was making her sick. He told her he couldn't
> > stop it and that it was perfectly natural. She told him to
> > see a doctor; she was concerned that one day he would blow
> > his guts out.
> > The years went by and he continued to blast them out! Then
> > one Thanksgiving morning as she was preparing the turkey for
> > dinner and he was upstairs sound asleep, she looked at the
> > bowl where she had put the turkey innards and neck, gizzard,
> > liver and all the spare parts and a malicious thought came to
> > her. She took the bowl and went upstairs where her husband
> > was sound asleep and, gently pulling back the bed covers, she
> > pulled back the elastic waistband of his underpants and
> > emptied the bowl of turkey guts into his shorts.
> > Some time later she heard her husband waken with his usual
> > trumpeting which was followed by a blood curdling scream and
> > the sound of frantic footsteps as he ran into the bathroom.
> > The wife could hardly control herself as she rolled on the
> > floor laughing, tears in her eyes! After years of torture she
> > reckoned she had got him back pretty good.
> > About twenty minutes later, her husband came downstairs in
> > his bloodstained underpants with a look of horror on his
> > face. She bit her lip as she asked him what was the matter.
> > He said, "Honey, you were right." "All these years you have
> > warned me and I didn't listen to you."
> > "What do you mean?" asked his wife.
> > "Well, you always told me that one day I would end up farting
> > my guts out, and today it finally happened. But by the grace
> > of God, some Vaseline, and two fingers, I think I got most of
> > them back in."