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Another page out of the life of BPBrucie... An old man on a Moped, looking about 100 years old, pulls up next to a doctor at a street light. The old man looks over at the sleek shiny car and asks, "What kind of car ya got there, sonny?" The doctor replies, "A Ferrari GTO. It cost half a million dollars!" "That's a lot of money," says the old man. "Why does it cost so much?" "Because this car can do up to 320 miles an hour!" states the doctor proudly. The Moped driver asks, "Mind if I take a look inside?" "No problem," replies the doctor. So the old man pokes his head in the window and looks around. Then, sitting back on his Moped, the old man says, "That's a pretty nice car, all right ... but I'll stick with my Moped!" Just then the light changes, so the doctor decides to show the old man just what his car can do. He floors it, and within 30 seconds the speedometer reads 160 mph. Suddenly, he notices a dot in his rear view mirror. It seems to be getting closer! He slows down to see what it could be and suddenly WHHOOOOOOSSSSSHHH! Something whips by him going much faster! "What on earth could be going faster than my Ferrari?" the doctor asks himself. He floors the accelerator and takes the Ferrari up to 250 mph. Then, up ahead of him, he sees that it's the old man on the Moped! Amazed that the Moped could pass his Ferrari, he gives it more gas and passes the Moped at 275 mph and He's feeling pretty good until he looks in his mirror and sees the old man gaining on him AGAIN! Astounded by the speed of this old guy, he floors the gas pedal and takes the Ferrari all the way up to 320 mph. Not ten seconds later, he sees the Moped bearing down on him again! The Ferrari is flat out, and there's nothing he can do! Suddenly, the Moped plows into the back of his Ferrari, demolishing the rear end. The doctor stops and jumps out and unbelievably the old man is still alive. He runs up to the mangled old man and says, "I'm a doctor ... Is there anything I can do for you?" The old man whispers, "Unhook my suspenders from your side view mirror". Life Member: The American Vast Right Wing Conspiracy Jan 20, 2009.. Prisoner in Dumocrat 'Occupied America', Partisan in the 'Save America' Underground Beavis..... James Beavis..... Of Her Majesty's Secret Service..... Spell Check Division "Posterity — you will never know how much it has cost my generation to preserve your freedom. I hope you will make good use of it." John Quincy Adams A reporter did a human-interest piece on the Texas Rangers. The reporter recognized the Colt Model 1911 the Ranger was carrying and asked him "Why do you carry a 45?" The Ranger responded, "Because they don't make a 46." Duhboy....Nuttier than Squirrel Poop... | ||
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When the Jag V12 XJS came out a mate got one, and got me to organize a bit of work on it. So it was pretty fast, I was out giving it a bit of stick on a totally empty motorway one night. When I spot car lights coming up so I slow case it's a cop. But it was only a beat up little red Ford van. So I boot the car again ... Sure enough the little van pulls around me like I'm on a bicycle and disappears in the distance. Later I caught him in the service stop, where he showed me the blown big block in the back. "When doing battle, seek a quick victory." | |||
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Cheers, Dave. Aut Inveniam Viam aut Faciam. | |||
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I love rigs like that.. we call them sleepers over here.. they don't look like they will do the speed that they are capable of... I still remember years ago, when the Guiness World Book of Records, stated that the fastest speeding ticket given at one time was 215 mph... It was in Britain.. at the time, the police radar units registered up to 215 mph... on a Sunday morning, some chpa was out road testing what he had built in his garage... The Vehicle was an early 1950s Jag Mark 1 thru 7 series Salon....he had home built a 6 speed manual transmission for the car.... He had modified the car to take a Rolls Royce Merlin Engine, which had previously been installed in a late Mark Spitfire.... As he went thru the radar trap on the M-1... the police officers stated that he was still accelerating at the time, when the radar unit hit its max capacity... The guy in the old Jaguar pulled over after the cops got after him, or tried to at least... good old Commander Cody and His Lost Planet Airmen... singing Hot Rod Lincoln!!! Life Member: The American Vast Right Wing Conspiracy Jan 20, 2009.. Prisoner in Dumocrat 'Occupied America', Partisan in the 'Save America' Underground Beavis..... James Beavis..... Of Her Majesty's Secret Service..... Spell Check Division "Posterity — you will never know how much it has cost my generation to preserve your freedom. I hope you will make good use of it." John Quincy Adams A reporter did a human-interest piece on the Texas Rangers. The reporter recognized the Colt Model 1911 the Ranger was carrying and asked him "Why do you carry a 45?" The Ranger responded, "Because they don't make a 46." Duhboy....Nuttier than Squirrel Poop... | |||
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