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Just call me Mr. Lucky
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This guy is sitting at the bar smiling . the bartender asks 'whats going on?" the guy says "just call me Mr. Lucky" Bartender asks"why did you have a good day at the track or something?" "No" he says "Me and my girl friend were in bed making love late last night and we got a little loud- the damn downstairs neighbor started hitting on the ceiling with a broom-but we just kept going. Well he got so mad he shot up thru the floor with a gun- bullet came right thru the mattress right between her legs and blowed my left nut off!" "you call that lucky" said the bartender. "Damm Right " the guy says "Five minutes earlier it would have got me right between the eyes!!"
 
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