As a former airline pilot, I worked with flight attendants on a daily basis. It's a fact of life that most male F/A's are gay. One morning before an early departure, I noticed that Bruce, a F/A I'd flown with before, seemed really down in the dumps. I asked him why?

He replied, "I just had my yearly physical, and found out I was HIV Positive."

"Bummer, dude," I replied. "Where do you think you got it?"

"From a toilet seat," he responded.

"Bruce, everyone knows you can't catch HIV from a toilet seat," I retorted.

"You can if you sit down before the other guy gets up!" he replied...

Years ago the base commanders daughter came down with the clap. DR. asked her where she caught it. She said it must have been in the swimming pool from those dirty marines.Doc says,well maybe but you picked one helluva place to do your screwing.