I have a Golden Retriever & I was buying a large bag of Purina at
Wal-Mart and was in line to check out.

A woman behind me asked if I had a dog. On impulse, I told her
that no, I was starting The Purina Diet again, although I probably
shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that
I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward
with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way
that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets
and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the
food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.

I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was
by now enthralled with my story.

Horrified, she asked if I'd ended up in the hospital in that
condition because I had been poisoned. I told her no; it was
because I'd been sitting in the street licking my balls and a car
hit me.

Keep off the street....

Didn't your mistress ever train you to stay in the yard? I guess even more important, "Yeh. but are you housebroken?"

Still, a tale well worth a grin. Will have to tell that one down at the Retriever's Club meeting.....