Three tourists got lost while on vacation in south america, and were found by a tribe of cannibals. There was an Englishmen, a Frenchman, and a New Yorker (U.S.)

They were taken in front of the chief, and he explained to them in fair english,"I want you to know that we are cannibals, and are going to eat you, but that your deaths will not be pointless. We will use your skins to make a canoe, this is what allows us to travel along the rivers and is the only way we are able to trade. your deaths will be very noble sacrifices."

The frenchman asked,"well may we have a last wish?"

"of course!" the chief assured him.

Frenchman,"well, I would like a pistol please, so I may die honorably." The chief handed him a pistol with a single shot. The Frenchman held it to his head, said "viva la France!" and pulled the trigger.

Next the British dude asked for the pistol, he too put it to his head and said "long live the queen!" and BANG!

The chief turned to the New Yorker with the pistol, he looked at it and said,"no, I'd like a fork." "A fork?" the chief was puzzled but had a fork brought, and stood horrified as the New Yorker began stabbing himself all over.

"What are you doing?!" The chief yelled. The New Yorker stopped, look at him and spat,"Fuck your canoe!!"