I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry.
That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste.

David Bissonette

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.

Sacha Guitry

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together.

Hemant Joshi

By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.

Socrates

Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them.

Dumas

The great question... which I have not been able to answer... is, "What does a woman want?

Sigmund Freud

I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.

Anonymous

"Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays."

Henny Youngman

"I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years."

Sam Kinison

"There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage."

James Holt McGavran

"I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me, and the second one didn't."

Patrick Murray

Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming
1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it,
2. Whenever you're right, shut up.

Nash

The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once...

Anonymous

You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.

Henny Youngman

My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.

Rodney Dangerfield

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.

Milton Berle

Marriage is the only war where one sleeps with the enemy.

Anonymous

A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Wife wanted". Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."

Anonymous

First Guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!"
Second Guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive."

SEND THIS TO ALL THE GUYS TO GIVE THEM A GOOD LAUGH......AND TO THOSE LADIES WITH A SENSE OF HUMOUR WHO CAN HANDLE IT!!!!!!!

My father has been married to my mother for 59 years.
He tell me that it just keeps getting worse.

"A man in love is not complete until he's married."

Then he's FINISHED!



Love is a great institution!


(If you like being institutionalized.)

Brad,
Those were great! Good post.

Thanks Frank

Will see if I can find a few more............

Brad

Brad. This last Sun was 23 years for me this time around, seems like 60 though!

quote:

Originally posted by swheeler:
Brad. This last Sun was 23 years for me this time around, seems like 60 though!

Congratulations........, very few of us can say that.

I've just managed 2 years this time around.....

Brad

Did you know that married men live longer than single men?
Or does it just seem longer?

quote:

Originally posted by prof242:
Did you know that married men live longer than single men?
Or does it just seem longer?

Married men die befor their wives............
.....................because they want too!!