An Englishman is travelling in the highlands of Scotland.

He enters a pub on a quiet afternoon, seats himself at the bar and asks for a pint. An old Scot sitting at the bar who has not quite caught the English accent asks:" Where are ye from?".

The Englishman draws himself up proudly and proclaims: " I am from the finest country on earth!"

The old Scot says: " Funny, you don't sound Scots".

( To all Scots - This is positively the last joke, as an Irishman, I will tell on behalf of the Scots!)