NASA was interviewing people to be sent to Mars. Only one could go and couldn't return to Earth.
The first applicant, was an Irishman and he was asked how much he wanted to be paid for going." A $1,000,000. " he answered "because I want to donate it to the church". After a few more applicants it was my turn to be interviewed, and how much would you ask? said the interviewer, I whispered in the interviewers ear,"$3.000.000." "Why so much more than the others" ? asked the interviewer.
"Well" I replied "if you give me $3,000,000 I'll give you $1,000,000 keep $1,000,000 for myself,and give The Irishman a $1,000,000 and send him to Mars".

But only if the Irishman was Gerry375!

Just because some Aussies don't like what I report from Aussie joke web sites is no reason to want to send me somewheres else!. (I may want, from time to time,that Aussies go to somewheres even hotter than the outback, but I never would say so because, as an Irishman, I have a gentle tolerant nature) I do wish that the general level of discussion could be raised here. ( As for the poster from Ohio, one of our states of the US - or so I am told, he probably is one of those unfortunate souls who never were exposed to Irish culture. I would never be one of those internet cowards who malign people anonymously - or I might think that he was Scots or even (Heaven forbid!) English!. I know, I know, I should not deliver such insults! THat damn Aussie, Dave, made me do it!. Stop me before I insult again!

OK Gerry, can do. "Presto chango", now you are a British civil servant! That should stop you insulting people (except in an extremely polite fashion!).

Hey Gerry, the Irishman is the hero of the story. Brave, generous and religious. I realize your probably not used Irish being portrade that way in jokes. Or is it your personal experiance with them? BTW thanks for being one of the few New Yorkers that kinda, maybe knew there was a state somewhere out there called Ohio.

Ohiosam:

Thanks for being good natured about my remark about Ohio. I had a brother who lived in Zanesville so I do know about Ohio. (BTW, I have no idea how old you are but I'll be 76 this week so you may not have heard this story. In 1953, it was proposed to celebrate an anniversary of the admission of Ohio into the Union. It was discovered that somehow certain papers had not been filed properly in the US Congress to show that the admission of Ohio into the Union had been approved. There were many jokes at the time about it. It was that story I had in mind - and, of course, no insult to another state was intended)

Gerry,
If I was the kind to get pissy when someone jerks my chain I'd be over on the political forum. I've got a diverse enough ancestry to be the butt of many jokes. However you being Irish and a lawyer you probably have me beat

I've heard about the mistake in admitting Ohio into the union. It comes up every once in awhile when someone wants to claim certain amendments to the Constitution weren't properly approved.
Sam