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Important Health Advice For Women

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29 January 2009, 18:40
Moremonte
Important Health Advice For Women
IMPORTANT HEALTH ADVICE FOR WOMEN

Do you have feelings of inadequacy?
Do you suffer from shyness?
Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, ask your doctor or pharmacist about Margaritas.

Margaritas are the safe, natural way to feel better and more confident about yourself and your actions.

Margaritas can help ease you out of your shyness and let you tell the world that you're ready and willing to do just about anything.

You will notice the benefits of Margaritas almost immediately and with a regimen of regular doses you can overcome any obstacles that prevent you from living the life you want to live.

Shyness and awkwardness will be a thing of the past and you will discover many talents you never knew you had. Stop hiding and start living, with Margaritas.

Margaritas may not be right for everyone. Women who are pregnant or nursing should not use Margaritas. However, women who wouldn't mind nursing or becoming pregnant are encouraged to try it.

Side effects may include:
- Dizziness, nausea, vomiting, incarceration
- Erotic lustfulness
- Loss of motor control
- Loss of clothing
- Loss of money
- Loss of virginity
- Loss of bladder control
- Attraction to ugly men
- Table dancing
- Headache
- Dehydration
- Dry mouth
- And a desire to sing Karaoke

WARNING:
The consumption of Margaritas may make you think you are whispering when you are not.

WARNING:
The consumption of Margaritas may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.

WARNING:
The consumption of Margaritas may cause you to think you can sing.

WARNING:
The consumption of Margaritas may make you think you can logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting. Margaritas are also available in generic form, known as tequila. Just as effective and costs only a fraction.
29 January 2009, 20:52
nkonka
Well done.

I've always prescribed the three stages of tequila....

I'm good looking
I'm bulletproof
I'm invisible


Dan Donarski
Hunter's Horn Adventures
Sault Ste. Marie, MI 49783
906-632-1947
www.huntershornadventures.com
29 January 2009, 21:49
375hnh
one tequila, two tequila, three tequila.... Floor


Let us speak courteously, deal fairly, and keep ourselves armed and ready

Theodore Roosevelt
30 January 2009, 09:08
ncboman
The old Cadillac Saloon in Nuevo Laredo has the most powerful margaritas in the world. Smiler
30 January 2009, 09:19
Alberta Canuck
Many, many years ago when I used to do about 80-85 baseball games a year, I would always take a 1/2 pint of Tequila into the announcers/press box with me at the beginning of each game. For double-headers I might take a little more.

By the 7th inning stretch, no basball game was ever boring to me!

Mescal is God's gift to man. Always remember, "work is the curse of the drinking class".
30 January 2009, 11:21
Norman Conquest
And then for the Ladies;concerning MargaritasBig Grinrink 2 at the most.3 you're under the table.4 you're under the host.


Never mistake motion for action.
31 January 2009, 00:41
CoyoteKiller82
Back when I worked for a local potatoe farmer, we would have a "tekillia" (pronounced te-kill-ya)night at least once every harvest. During the last one I attended I ended up in my boxer shorts dancing around the shop.....the wall of shame never looked so good, or is that bad? Eeker

Boy do I ever miss Frankie...he invented tekillia night, he is no longer among us....God bless buddy!
31 January 2009, 08:40
Michael Robinson
clap

But it is much worse than that.

In my experience, I have found that those who drown themselves in tequila are not just drunks, they are suicidal, drink themselves to death drunks.

Must be the worms.


Mike

Wilderness is my cathedral, and hunting is my prayer.
31 January 2009, 23:04
fla3006
Don't waste money on aged pure blue agave tequilas for making Margaritas, you can't tell any difference, particularly after the first. If starting with shots, that's another matter.


NRA Life Member, Band of Bubbas Charter Member, PGCA, DRSS.
Shoot & hunt with vintage classics.