19 November 2017, 21:57
xgruntSpeech
A couple of us local retired types from the Senior Center were asked to address a high school gathering put on by the PTA. As luck would have it, I was the only speaker to show up, so I had the stage to myself.
I talked about staying in school, getting good grades and all that usual bullshit; and since I had plenty of time because those other guys didn't show, I threw it open for questions. The last one asked was, "Can you give us a couple of your life's philosophical beliefs?”
I said, “That’s an easy one. Looking back over my 6+ decades, I believe I've spent close to 90% of my earnings on booze and whores. The rest I just wasted.”
I was escorted out without getting to finish my last two rules to live by:
1) If it flies, floats, or fucks, it’s cheaper to rent it!
2) If it’s got tits or tires, you’re gonna have problems with it
I
19 November 2017, 22:03
Moremonte
You Did Not Give Them Bad Info On Life!! Good One!!
22 November 2017, 04:44
Monkeyhunterquote:
Originally posted by xgrunt:
A couple of us local retired types from the Senior Center were asked to address a high school gathering put on by the PTA. As luck would have it, I was the only speaker to show up, so I had the stage to myself.
I talked about staying in school, getting good grades and all that usual bullshit; and since I had plenty of time because those other guys didn't show, I threw it open for questions. The last one asked was, "Can you give us a couple of your life's philosophical beliefs?”
I said, “That’s an easy one. Looking back over my 6+ decades, I believe I've spent close to 90% of my earnings on booze and whores. The rest I just wasted.”
I was escorted out without getting to finish my last two rules to live by:
1) If it flies, floats, or fucks, it’s cheaper to rent it!
2) If it’s got tits or tires, you’re gonna have problems with it
I
24 November 2017, 10:58
NormanConquestNothing new under the sun here. Truly, in the past I was asked to do a speech to a graduating class;Mine was quite lame by comparison;I just passed the buck by telling the young men to read Winston Churchill if they wanted to find truth.I still believe that to be sound advice.
