A VERY ugly man walks into the bar with a big grin on his face, and orders a Draft beer.

'What are you so happy about?', asks the Bartender.

'Well, I'll tell you,' replies the ugly man.

'As you know, I live by the railroad tracks.

Well, on my way home from the bar last night, I noticed a young woman tied to the tracks, just like in the films. I, of course, went and cut her free and took her back to my place.

Anyway, to make a long story short, I scored big time! We made love all Night, all over the house. We did everything! Me on top, sometimes her on top, every position imaginable!'

'Fantastic, you lucky bastard!', exclaimed the Bartender. 'Was she pretty?'

'Dunno ... Never found the head!'

Never saw That Train a Comin'.Good One.