One day a mouse was walking through the jungle and came upon a lion that was in such pain that he could hardly move.
The mouse although very scared went to the lion and asked---Can I help you, what is the matter?
The lion answers I have a big thorn in my paw and can't get it out! It is very painful and I can't walk.
The mouse is able to tug very hard and get the thorn out.
The lion is very happy and grateful and says to the mouse--- Mr. mouse, I am the KING OF THE JUNGLE and will grant any wish that you want.
The mouse considers it for a moment and says to the lion---Mr. Lion, I always wanted to make it with a giraffe!
The lion says --You've got it and gets the mouse a very nice young female giraffe.
The lion then says--I will leave you two alone now, and leaves.
A few hours go by and the lion comes back to check on the mouse.
He finds the mouse lying on the ground panting and hardly able to move.
The lion says Mr. Mouse what is the matter, what happened?
The mouse says---I'm OK I'll be alright in a little while, but between-----

THE KISSIN' AND THE F*#^IN' I must have run a million miles!

Hip