Two blokes are sitting on a plane and they both happen to have 'black eyes'. They both acknowledge each other and after a while curiosity gets the better of one of the blokes and he leans over and asks the other fella how he aquired his 'shiner' - "Hey, mate - I couldn't help noticing your black eye - how did you get yours ?"

"Ah well, a bit of a Freudien slip earned me this little beauty" he replies - "I walked up to the flight desk to order my ticket to Pittsburgh, but the lass who was working on the desk was gorgeous and she had a cracking 'top shelf' on her, and I ended up asking her for a ticket to 'Titsburgh' instead, so she gave me a good slap ! What about you - how did you get your shiner ?"

"Well, it's really amazing that you said it happened because of a Freudien slip, because a very similar thing happened to me - I was sitting having dinner with my wife last night and instead of saying 'could you pass the salt please darling' I said 'You've ruined my life you fucking fat arsed bitch.'

LMAO, the second guy was me.

HAHAHAHAHAHA

Thanks, I needed a laugh.

Maybe kids say the darndest things, 'cause they take after their dads.

A guy shows up for work with a black eye, and his co-workers ask him how he got it. He replies "Well I was arguing with my wife last night, and when she said Shut Up I thought she said Stand Up!"