Interesting WOMEN'S T-shirts

1. I CHILDPROOFED MY HOUSE, BUT THEY STILL GET IN.

2. (On the front) 60 IS NOT OLD. (On the back)IF YOU'RE A TREE.

3. DAMN RIGHT I'M STILL HOT . . . . . IT JUST COMES IN FLASHES.

4. AT MY AGE, "GETTING LUCKY" MEANS FINDING MY CAR IN THE PARKING LOT.

5. MY REALITY CHECK JUST BOUNCED.

6 LIFE IS SHORT. MAKE FUN OF IT.

7. I'M NOT 50. I'M $49.95 PLUS TAX.

8. I NEED SOMEBODY BAD. ARE YOU BAD?

9. PHYSICALLY PFFFFFT!

10. I'M NOT A SNOB. I'M JUST BETTER THAN YOU ARE .

11. IT'S MY CAT'S WORLD. I'M JUST HERE TO OPEN CANS.

12. EARTH IS THE INSANE ASYLUM OF THE UNIVERSE.

13. KEEP STARING. I MAY DO A TRICK.

14. WE GOT RID OF THE KIDS.
THE CAT WAS ALLERGIC.

15. DANGEROUSLY UNDER-MEDICATED.

16. MY MIND WORKS LIKE LIGHTNING. ONE BRILLIANT FLASH AND IT'S GONE.

17. CATS REGARD PEOPLE AS WARM-BLOODED FURNITURE

18. LIVE YOUR LIFE SO THAT WHEN YOU DIE, THE PREACHER WILL NOT HAVE TO TELL LIES AT YOUR FUNERAL.

19. IN GOD WE TRUST. ALL OTHERS WE POLYGRAPH

20. BUCKLE UP. MAKES IT HARDER FOR ALIENS TO SNATCH YOU FROM YOUR CAR