A Man's Age as Determined by
> a Trip to Home Depot
>
>
> You are in the middle of
> some kind of project around the house .
> Mowing the
> lawn, putting in a new fence, painting the living room or whatever.
> You are hot and sweaty, covered in dust, lawn clippings, dirt or
> paint. You have your old work clothes on. You know the outfit --
> shorts with the hole in the crotch, old T-shirt with a stain from
> who-knows-what and an old pair of tennis shoes.
> Right in the middle of
> this great home improvement project you realize you need to run to
> Home Depot to get something to help complete the job.
> Depending on your age you might do
> the following:
>
> In
> your 20's: Stop
> what you are doing. Shave, take a shower, blow dry your hair, brush
> your teeth, floss and put on clean clothes. Check yourself in the
> mirror and flex. Add a dab of your favorite cologne because you never
> know, you just might meet some hot chick while standing in the
> checkout lane. And you went to school with the pretty girl running
> the register.
> In your 30's: Stop what you are doing, put on clean shorts and shirt.
> Change shoes. You married the hot chick so no need for much else. Wash
> your hands and comb your hair. Check yourself in the mirror. Still
> got it. Add a shot of your favorite cologne to cover the smell. The
> cute girl running the register is the kid sister to someone you went
> to school with.
> In your 40's: Stop what you are doing. Put on a sweatshirt that is
> long enough to cover the hole in the crotch of your shorts. Put on
> different shoes and a hat. Wash your hands. Your bottle of Brute
> Cologne is almost empty so you don't want to waste any of it on a trip
> to Home Depot. Check yourself in the mirror and do more sucking in
> than flexing.
> The hot young thing
> running the register is your daughter's age and you feel weird
> thinking she is spicy.
> In
> your 50's: Stop
> what you are doing. Put on a hat; wipe the dirt off your hands onto
> your shirt.
> Change shoes because
> you don't want to get dog crap in your new sports car. Check yourself
> in the mirror and you swear not to wear that shirt anymore because it
> makes you look fat. The Cutie running the register smiles when she
> sees you coming and you think you still have it. Then you remember the
> hat you have on is from Bubba's Bait & Beer Bar and it says, 'I Got
> Worms.'
> In your 60's: Stop what you are doing. No need for a hat anymore.
> Hose the dog crap off your shoes. The mirror was shattered when you
> were in your 50's. You hope you have underwear on so nothing hangs out
> the hole in your pants. The girl running the register may be cute, but
> you don't have your glasses on so you are not sure.
> In
> your 70's: Stop what you are doing. Wait to go to Home Depot until the
> drug store has your prescriptions ready, too. Don't even notice the
> dog crap on your shoes.
> The young thing at the register
> stares at you and you realize your balls are hanging out the hole in
> your crotch.
> In
> your 80's: Stop
> what you are doing. Start again. Then stop again.
> Now you remember you
> need to go to Home Depot. Go to Wal-Mart instead and wander around
> trying to think what it is you are looking for.
> Fart out loud and you think someone
> called out your name. You went to school with the old lady who greeted
> you at the front door.
> In
> your 90's & beyond: What's a home deep hoe?
> Something for my garden? Where am I? Who am I? Why am I reading this?
> Did I send it? Did you? Who farted?
>
>

How can the truth be so damned funny?
(60's)
Zeke

Yep,That 60's Thing Is There!!