My wife came downstairs the other night and found me sitting in the dark and asked me, "What are you doing down here?"

I asked her if she remembered the night her Dad caught me and her in my car in the driveway making love when we were still in high school. He put a shotgun in my face and said, "Son your going to make an honest woman out of my daughter and marry her or I'll see that you go to prison for 20 years for rape."

The wife got kind of of teary eyed and said, "Oh honey yes I remember. What in the world made you think of that?"

I cleared my throat and got kind of teary eyed myself replying. "Well...today I would have been getting out of prison."